The Miami Dolphins Once Again Put on a Tanking Clinic Against The Patriots

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Ladies and gentleman, the Miami Dolphins have done it again. Yesterday, the ethical tank was on full display for all 10,000 people in attendance and maybe for another 1,000 TV watchers. This team just gets it. Lace your cleats up, put your pads on, bite down on your mouthpiece, go out and compete, and then lose. 

I’ve seen more tanks than playoff wins in my life (not kidding). I know what a good tank looks like and I know what a bad tank looks like. However, this is my first time seeing a perfect tank. I’m talking USA premium grade steel tank. We know we aren’t going to win the battle but when the dust settles and the bodies are counted we will win the war. For the first time in years, the Miami Dolphins hit on draft picks. We have 14 rookies on a 53 man roster and six of them are fucking dawgs. 

Every week they get better and better and better. At the beginning of the season I would watch the Dolphins play and feel nothing. No skin in the game, no heightened emotions, it was as if the game was on for background noise. That is no longer the case. Since the bye week this team has flipped the script. I’d say that out of a four hour game I truly think we can win for two and a half hours which is a monumental leap from zero. 

This team is feeding us fans the dopamine we need to enjoy an NFL Sunday while also sticking to the script so we can potentially draft the guy who can save this poverty ass franchise. And as a Dolphins fan that’s all you can ask for. Turn on the game, feel the excitement rush through your body like you’re about to steal a game you shouldn’t win and then ultimately lose. 

I’ve tried to refrain from being critical of Malik Willis this year because at the end of the day I don’t think there’s many QB’s that could succeed with this Dolphins roster, but seven weeks into the season and it’s not a supporting cast issue, he’s just not the guy. Solid back up, but far from a franchise guy. There’s too many head scratching throws, bad sacks, and lack of consistency. It honestly reminds me of Tua which should be every Dolphins fan biggest nightmare. However, with that being said, he is the perfect QB to lead this tank, so for that, thank you, Malik.