Stathole Sports ETF® Shareholder Update - We Are Just One Small +4,123 Parlay Away From Winning Again
If this isn't what your mutual fund performance charts look like then you ain't living life. Now it's been a little while since we've had a chance to give a proper shareholder update on the Stathole ETF and I'm pleased to say that after tonight, we have the chance to be over $100 up since inception and all we need is to hit the following Hail Mary:
Yep. That's right. This is my way of saying we are pretty much dead. But then again - that's what I thought when pulling the miracle +3325 with the final remaining $13 or so in the middle of May to spike us back into plus territory. But alas. It's been a slow death march since then.
Abandoning the original plan of betting strategy of taking ridiculous parlay legs that pretty much can't lose to win crumbs such as Memphis +38.5 was probably not the right move but I just had to find a way to get us back in black with some momentum. I've failed in this.
So far.
I know thing look bleak. But think like Eagle Eye Cherry: we still have tonight. And I will say this. It's been an honor to be your fake ETF portfolio manager and although I wish things ended better, it was fun playing around with different betting strategies and even coming up with new games such as Blackout Bingo Shots On Goal:
That would have been another +3000 or so.
Look. I know this ship is sinking. And it makes me sad to know the Nathan's Hot Dog Contest is just around the corner and I won't be there to throw everything I have into Joey Chestnut for the prospect of adding .37 to the portfolio.
Then again. Who knows? Everyone has the Pacers dead to water. But if there's one thing we know about this team it's that anything can happen. Haliburton is hurt, so we'll definitely need Siakam to take on the load if they can force a Game 7. And that should leave Nesmith open for a some three balls. I can't see him making less than three if Indiana finds a way to pull this off.
In any event - let's roll the dice here. Crazier things have happened.
See you on the other side.
Shareholder Report Log 5 May 15
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Shareholder Report Log 1 - April 15
