Evgeni Malkin Is The Latest Pro Athlete To Have Their House Broken Into While Playing A Game, And Now His 3 Stanley Cup Championship Rings Are Gone
We must have some real Danny Ocean's on our hands here, boys. Oh good job! You broke into a professional athlete's house when you knew they'd be out because you printed out a PDF of their schedule? You must be a real criminal mastermind.
Hey, bozos. How's about you dickwads stick to taking things like cash and credit cards and TVs like normal criminals. Things you'd be able to pawn off that won't be as obvious as a goddamn 2009, 2016, and 2017 Stanley Cup Championship ring. Imagine some squirrelly looking meth'd out piece of shit (most people in Pittsburgh) trying to sell off a Stanley Cup Championship ring without it being the most obviously traceable crime in the world.
Obviously this sucks for Geno. He seems like a superstar who just goes about his life as if he were as ordinary as you and me. Can't imagine he's an asshole to anybody. Can't imagine he goes out of his way to be a prick to anybody. Just a dude who is disgustingly dirty as the sport of hockey, and goes around muttering in broken English all day about playing 3 years in Russian Super League. He's done so much for the city of Pittsburgh, leading them to 3 Stanley Cup Championships in the past 15 years.
And how does he get repaid? By having his home broken into and his 3 Cup rings stolen while he's out playing against the Seattle Kraken. But those rings will be back in his possession at some point. Because it's not like these morons are just going to keep those rings for their own personal memorabilia collection. They're going to try to sell them, and it's going to be the easiest bust in Pittsburgh PD history.
Personally I don't think these guys should have to go to jail. Prisons are already too overcrowded as it is. So instead of a prison sentence, they should have to stand in net without any gear on and let Geno unload 6 clappers directly to their nuts. One shot to both nuts for each ring.