Sometimes The Meat Just Doesn't Want To Speak For Itself
Our good pal Billy decided to throw some pork on the menu over the weekend. Now I'd never go out of my way to shit on someone who is attempting to make some delicious barbecue, but the final result ends up being...well...less than great. I've always said the only way to make great barbecue is by making a ton of shitty barbecue along the way. It's a process. It's a journey. Thinking you can fire up a smoker for the first time and churn out some Texas Monthly Top 50 caliber brisket would be like someone picking up a baseball bat for the first time and thinking they could get a hit against a major league pitcher.
With all that being said...an effort at least needs to be made. Watch a few YouTube videos or something to at least get an idea on what you should be doing. At the end of the day, an animal had to die in order for you to cook it. The least you can do is turn that animal into something delicious. And sometimes it needs a little help to get there. Sometimes it takes kosher salt, some black pepper, granulated garlic, paprika, a little chili powder, maybe some brown sugar if you're someone who likes your bbq to be a little on the sweet side. Sometimes the meat just doesn't want to speak for itself. It's like going to a concert and not giving the performer a microphone because their voice should be loud enough.
So I'd just like to offer my services to young William and guide this man through his journey to cooking some delicious barbecue.
One weekend is all it'll take. He can stay in my guest bedroom (humble brag), we can fire up the smoker and cook it all. Pork butt, ribs, brisket, chicken, sausage. Heck, we can go nuts and get anybody else involved who might need a few pointers when it comes to cooking barbecue. I've spent the past few years here at Barstool Sports [dot] com putting out plenty of videos on how to cook some pretty decent barbecue. I know there are plenty things in my life that even at my very best, I'm still just average at. But when it comes to cooking BBQ? I'll give myself the credit and say I'm pretty damn good at it.
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