The Flyers Might Still Suck, But They Just Got A Helluva Lot Handsomer By Bringing Patrick Sharp Back Home

Jordie6/13/2023 6:20 PM

Dave Sandford. Getty Images.

It doesn't take rocket appliance to understand that the Philadelphia Flyers are cursed. Just look at all the players who have been traded by the Flyers and then went on to win the Stanley Cup shortly thereafter with their new team. Rod Brind'Amour and Justin Williams went on to win a Cup with the Carolina Hurricanes. Mike Richards and Jeff Carter went off to win a Cup with the LA Kings. Brayden Schenn, Braydon Coburn, Kimmo Timonen. The list goes on and on.

If you make a trade with the Philadelphia Flyers, your team immediately becomes the Stanley Cup favorites. I don't know how or why the curse started, but I just know it to be true.

Admittedly, I do not know a ton about witchcraft and curses. But from what I've gathered in movies, typically you need to do something like return and item that has been stolen, retrieve an artifact that has been lost, or really just go back to right a wrong. I'd go ahead and say that bringing Patrick Sharp back from the Blackhawks, in any capacity, fits that bill.

Patrick Sharp was traded from Philly to Chicago during the 2006-06 season in exchange for Matt Ellison and a 3rd round pick. All-time fuck up on the Flyers' behalf. Because just a few seasons later, he'd go on to help the Blackhawks win the Cup 3 times with a letter on his sweater. The first of which came against the Flyers in 2010.

God. Dammit.

Imagine if the Flyers had a guy like Patrick Sharp to add to that roster in 2010. Would have been nice. But at least Matt Ellison played a total of 7 games for the Flyers over the course of 2 seasons, and then went to the KHL in 2008. Jesus Christ what a sick joke that trade turned out to be. Also they took some duded named Jonathan Matsumoto in the 3rd round of the 2006 Draft with the pick they got from Montreal after trading the pick they got from Chicago in the Sharp trade. Have you ever heard of Jonathan Matsumoto? Me either.

Out of all the god awful Flyers trades in the past, this one might just be the most devastating. Patrick Sharp won 3 Stanley Cups with the Chicago Blackhawks, and the Flyers got 7 games out of Matt Ellison and some kid who never suited up for them at all after getting drafted.

Now what exactly does a "Special Advisor to Hockey Operations" actually do? Who knows, and who cares. All that matters is that Patrick Sharp is back in the building, and this might just be enough to reverse the curse. And even if it doesn't reverse it? Well at least the Flyers front office just got a helluva lot more handsome. I mean look at this son of a bitch. The man is a stallion. Absolute rockstar.