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The Arizona Coyotes Simply Refuse To Tank, So Stop Asking

Christian Petersen. Getty Images.

There's never been a bigger love affair in hockey than the one between Gary Bettman and the Arizona Coyotes. This is a franchise that has filed for bankruptcy, been locked out of their arena, embroiled in dysfunction, had to forfeit a 1st round draft pick for violating policies about testing players too early, had to renounce a draft pick after a player's racist past resurfaced, and are currently playing their home games in a college arena. Throughout it all, Gary Bettman refuses to give up hope that the Arizona Coyotes can survive.

So nothing would make Gary happier than to gift them Connor Bedard with the 1st overall selection in the 2023 NHL Draft. You pick up Connor Bedard in the 2023 Draft and now that sets you up to bring Auston Matthews home to the desert in the summer of 2024. All of a sudden it might look like the Coyotes could be on Wagon Watch. 

All it's going to take is for the Coyotes to lose a shit ton of games this year and put themselves in a spot where it wouldn't be totally outlandish for Gary Bettman to swing the draft lottery their way for that 1st overall pick. They don't need to finish in dead last or anything, just stay near that bottom 5. 

After a 47-save shutout from Connor Ingram and a shootout goal from Clayton Keller last night, the Arizona Coyotes have picked up at least 1 point in each of their last 7 games. 4 wins and 3 overtime losses. 11 points in their last 7, which now puts them in 27th place in the league. Good for the boys, horrific for the tank. 

A couple weeks ago Gary Bettman came out and said that nobody tanks in the NHL. I thought he was a lying sack of shit at the time. But after this quote from Keller, he might be on to something. The players might be physically incapable of tanking on a night to night basis. Put the boys out there on the ice and they're always going to do whatever it takes to get the dub. But if the fellas start stacking up too many wins in a row, it's only a matter of time before Billy Armstrong has to step in here and ship everybody out of town. 

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Everybody already knows that Chychrun is as good as gone. But if Bill Armstrong needs to get rid of 3 defensemen, 2 goalies, Nick Schmaltz and Lawson Crouse just to make sure this team literally can't win another game? Then that's what it'll take. You want to pick up points in 7 straight games? Looks like Bill Armstrong is going to have to make 7 straight trades before the deadline. 27 games left on the year. Every loss is crucial at this point. Have to keep up with Anaheim somehow.

@JordieBarstool