Fact: No Team In Professional Sports Has Had A Worse Year Than The Cannons Are Currently Having This Year
We're now just a week away from the end of the 2022 PLL regular season. For those of you who don't know, there are 8 teams in the league. 7 out of those teams advance to the playoffs with the 1st seed team getting a bye into the semifinals. The Whipsnakes have locked up that 1st seed and now 6 out of the 7 playoff spots are locked up. There's still one final spot up for grabs between the 2-7 Chaos and the 1-8 Cannons.
And with a loss on this upcoming Sunday, the Cannons would complete possibly one of the most historically awful season in professional sports history. Here's why.
Every year there are teams who have incredibly successful seasons. The LA Rams. The Golden State Warriors. The Colorado Avalanche. Whoever won the last World Series. All these teams went on to win championships in their respective sports and it doesn't get any better than that.
Then every year there are teams which have perfectly fine seasons. It may not have ended with a championship, but maybe they made the playoffs which was a success in its own right. Maybe they didn't even make the playoffs but at least they finished the year strong, and that's something they can build on moving forward. Whatever that team's specific definition of success is, they may have overachieved or just slightly underachieved. Either way, not a bad year.
Then every year there are teams which have been pure dog shit. Just a complete and total failure. Like the type of dog shit you can't even pick up with the bag. But the thing about these teams is more often than not, being totally dog shit at least means you get a good draft pick the following season. Maybe a savior is on the way with the 1st overall pick. If the Cannons are the only team to not make the playoffs in the PLL this season, at least they'll get that top pick in the 2023 draft, right?
Wrong. Because as it turns out, the Cannons already traded away their 2023 1st round draft pick in this year's draft. So that's what is on the line here this coming weekend in Seattle. Historically one of the most inefficient seasons in sports history. A year in which you are the only team in the league to not make the playoffs AND you already traded your 1st round pick in the upcoming draft away. I don't have it in me to complete the necessary research, but I feel fully confident in saying it doesn't get much worse than that.
Elsewhere around the league this past weekend.
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The Archers got a big 11-8 win over Chaos. Luckily the Chaos are somehow still alive at 2-7 on the year, and they could somehow still make the playoffs at 2-8 if they lose this weekend.
The Redwoods picked up a 14-12 win over the Waterdogs to lock up their spot in the playoffs. At least I'm pretty sure they technically weren't clinched before. But yeah big win for the Redwoods, who are one of only 3 teams to play in a championship game so far in this league. So that has to be worth something heading into the playoffs.
And finally…
I am officially putting the Atlas on Fraud Alert. At the start of the season I'd say the Atlas were my favorites to win a championship. But in the 4 year history of this league now, they have lost to the Whipsnakes every single time they've played. And this wasn't just any ordinary loss on Friday night. It was a 16-8 dick kicking that honestly felt more out of hand than the score would suggest. So if the Atlas ever want to be championship contenders, they have to be able to beat the Whips. They haven't even come close yet. So Atlas aren't on Fraud Warning, they are Fraud Alert.
P.S. -- Free Lyle.