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The Haters (Under Armour) Tried To Blacklist Me From Tom Brady's China Tour

As I said in the video, I have no idea if I was singled out as a threat because I’ve made videos trolling celebrities before or if one of the organizers has a personal grudge with Barstool Sports (read: El Pres)

Under Armour Portnoy

If it had anything to do with my past videos than the powers that be are missing a huge point. I troll squids and nemeses like Ted Cruz and Stephon Marbury.

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Why on earth would I troll my biggest hero?!? Your first trip to China can be a bit stressful(ask Francis) and the last thing I would want to do is make it more hectic for THE GOAT by charging the field like a crazed lunatic while he’s doing an interview.

Another thing they don’t realize is that it’s always better to use soft  diplomacy when you’re dealing with an unhinged D-list internet celebrity such as myself. When the Sharks tried banishing me from their stadium I had no choice but to terrorize the place in drag.

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Then they decided to make me their foreign brand ambassador and now the stadium is fucking PACKED every game. Same with Kochi Fighting Dogs, they gave me an all access pass and now their stock, along with Manny Ramirez’s, is through the ROOF. Ah well, Under Armour’s loss is Uncle Martian’s gain.

P.S. I think I’m gonna retire from the stalking athletes game for a few months. Obviously had to try to track down Brady as he’s not only the most influential character at Barstool but also all of New England, but other than that you can count me out. If it feels weird for me being in a a mob of people all demanding autographs it can’t be too pleasant for the guy being surrounded.

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Donnie Does

25 videos

1
I Reviewed the Hospitality Houses as the Summer Games

I Reviewed the Hospitality Houses as the Summer Games

2
Meeting Fans From Every Country at the Summer Games (LIVESTREAM HIGHLIGHTS)

Meeting Fans From Every Country at the Summer Games (LIVESTREAM HIGHLIGHTS)

3
I Tried to Find Nicky Smokes and Ben Mintz a Wife at the Shanghai Marriage Market

I Tried to Find Nicky Smokes and Ben Mintz a Wife at the Shanghai Marriage Market

4
The Shark Knight Returns: Back At My First Shanghai Sharks Game in FIVE YEARS

The Shark Knight Returns: Back At My First Shanghai Sharks Game in FIVE YEARS

5
Inside the Life of Pangzai: The Chinese Drinking King

Inside the Life of Pangzai: The Chinese Drinking King

6
Reuniting with Pangzai After FOUR YEARS

Reuniting with Pangzai After FOUR YEARS

7
I Returned to the Rowdiest Event in Sports: HONG KONG SEVENS

I Returned to the Rowdiest Event in Sports: HONG KONG SEVENS

8
My First Boat Party Ended in Disaster

My First Boat Party Ended in Disaster

9
We Made the Best Taco that ISN'T a Taco | GOONED UP w/ The Wonton Don

We Made the Best Taco that ISN'T a Taco | GOONED UP w/ The Wonton Don

10
We made CRISPY Gumbo-filled Rangoons | Gooned Up w/ Wonton Don

We made CRISPY Gumbo-filled Rangoons | Gooned Up w/ Wonton Don

11
Last Day in Shanghai LIVESTREAM HIGHLIGHTS

Last Day in Shanghai LIVESTREAM HIGHLIGHTS

12
I Made French Onion Rangoons with my Former Intern

I Made French Onion Rangoons with my Former Intern

13
Highlights from my First Livestream in CHINA

Highlights from my First Livestream in CHINA

14
GOONED UP: Lobster Fest

GOONED UP: Lobster Fest

15
TOP CHEF Teaches Me How to Cook Balkan Rangoons!

TOP CHEF Teaches Me How to Cook Balkan Rangoons!

16
We Made Chinese BBQ Rangoons! | GOONED UP w/ The Wonton Don

We Made Chinese BBQ Rangoons! | GOONED UP w/ The Wonton Don

17
Our Last Shot to Coach Ugandan Football to a Victory (Last Chance Uganda Finale)

Our Last Shot to Coach Ugandan Football to a Victory (Last Chance Uganda Finale)

18
Most Stressful Night of My Life (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 6)

Most Stressful Night of My Life (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 6)

19
We Taught 200 Children in Africa How to Play Football (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 5)

We Taught 200 Children in Africa How to Play Football (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 5)

20
We Returned to Africa to Beat the Kenyan Football Team (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 4)

We Returned to Africa to Beat the Kenyan Football Team (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 4)

21
We Played in the Biggest Football Game in Africa (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 3)

We Played in the Biggest Football Game in Africa (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 3)

22
We Almost Drowned After Our Last Practice in Uganda (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 2)

We Almost Drowned After Our Last Practice in Uganda (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 2)

23
We Got Hired to Coach the Ugandan Football Team (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 1)

We Got Hired to Coach the Ugandan Football Team (Last Chance Uganda Ep. 1)

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We Were ATTACKED on Our Gorilla Trek

We Were ATTACKED on Our Gorilla Trek

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Donnie and Billy Do the Pyramids! (Last Chance Uganda Prologue)

Donnie and Billy Do the Pyramids! (Last Chance Uganda Prologue)