Advertisement

Martin Shkreli Is Headed To Federal Prison After His Request To Go To A Minimum Security Prison Is Denied

Screen Shot 2018-04-18 at 2.07.44 PM

CNBC- “Pharma bro” scammer Martin Shkreli has been sent to a federal prison in New Jersey to serve the remainder of his seven-year sentence after being denied his request for a minimum-security federal camp. Shkreli, who had been in a Brooklyn federal jail since September, was shipped Tuesday to the low-security Fort Dix Federal Correctional Institution in New Jersey, according to the Bureau of Prisons. The prison is located on the U.S. military base at Fort Dix, about 80 miles from New York City, where Shkreli lived, and 30 miles from Philadelphia. It houses 3,945 inmates. Shkreli, 35, in March had asked to be sent to the minimum-security camp adjacent to another federal prison in Pennsylvania, FCI Canaan. Shkreli’s lawyer Benjamin Brafman declined to comment Wednesday. Brafman previously said that Judge Kiyo Matsumoto’s ruling that Shkreli was a public danger last September would prevent him from doing his time in a minimum-security camp.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!

This dude is FUCKED. F U C K E D. It makes me so happy. So so so so so so happy. Fuck this dude. Everyone always talks about how punchable Shkreli’s face is and we are about to put that to the ultimate test. We’re gonna find out just how punchable this dude’s face is. SPOILER ALERT: he’s gonna be eating punches (and likely much much much worse) as soon as he steps foot in federal prison. Let’s get that on Facebook Live. All of the Russian shit will be forgiven if Zuckerberg airs that. I would pay sooooooooo much money for a live look-in at Martin Shkreli’s first 48 hours in federal prison. It makes it even better that he requested to be sent to a minimum security prison and was denied. Something tells me the dudes at the real prison are gonna catch wind of that and throw him a welcome party. It’s rare when there’s pure justice in the world but Martin Shkreli getting pummeled in federal prison is pure justice.

The entire Martin Shkreli saga is a crash course in Just Don’t Be An Asshole. That’s how everyone should live. Just don’t be an asshole. That’s it. Pretty simple. The non-assholes won this round and will continue to win. Cause the bottom line is that it’s tough out there for everybody. The last thing we should be doing is intentionally trying to make the world a harder place to live. Shrkeli went the other way completely and lived by I’m Just Gonna Be An Asshole. He raised the price on AIDs medicine just for the fuck of it. The list of him being an asshole is endless. And what did it get him? It got him a 7-year sentence in a federal prison where he’s gonna get his asshole blown out on a daily basis. Just don’t be an asshole. Definitely don’t be Shekel’s asshole.