Bill Parcells And Bill Belichick Acting Like They Would Rather Drink Poison Than Enter The Jets Locker Room During "The Two Bills" Was Hilarious

Look, I may be a Giants fan. But I’m not a Jets hater. Far from it. I actually want the Jets to be good because when I am stuck somewhere on an NFL Sunday without Sunday Ticket and the only game on is the Jets game, I don’t want it to be a 10-6 barnburner. I want to watch good football. Many of my brothers and sisters in Mets misery don green and white in the winter, so there is no need for inter-fan beefs outside of baseball season. A united New York is a good New York, unless Rex Ryan wants to be a disrespectful asshole and cover up the Giants Lombardi trophies. Then shit gets personal.

But that doesn’t take away from the fact that video was fucking hysterical. You cannot teach the sound of disdain that Bill Belichick has in his voice for the Jets. No matter what his voice sounded like before he said Jets, it dropped down 3 full octaves and was topped with about 1,000 tons of spite every time the J word touched his lips. That sound doesn’t form overnight. It comes after years and years and years of grudging. I don’t know if Portnoy even has that much hatred for anybody, including Goodell, Cheeseboy, or KFC. Actually I don’t know if that’s true. Dave probably hates all those people more than BB hates the NYJ. But BB loathes the NYJ more than Portnoy loathes anything. Meanwhile, Bill Parcells acted like every skeleton in his closet was waiting for him in that locker room with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch. No need to talk about turning around a 1-15 dog and bringing that franchise to the AFC Championship Game and having a chance to win on the road against a great team before 4(!!!!!!!) lost fumbles ended their dream season and then a torn Achilles in Week One the next season ended it all. Nope. Parcells acted like he would rather Le’Veon Bell fired this tweet at the Jets heads yesterday and it was somehow only the 2nd most disrespectful thing to happen to that franchise in an 8 hour period.

While Giants and Patriots fans were treated to 1.5 hours of softcore sports porn last night, Jets fans got their faces rubbed in shit yet. Again. Sometimes you really gotta feel bad for the Goddamn Jets.