Is There Anything More American Than Adult Bama Fans Running For College Kids' Autographs?
At some point, all of us have said it. For you, it may have been when you saw that Sammy Watkins left yet another practice early with an undisclosed injury. Or maybe it was when you saw a video of Vontaze Burfict starting a practice fight. It doesn’t matter specifically when, but at this point in the summer we’ve all said, “FOOTBALL IS BACK, BABY!!!!”
I save those four glorious words for a special day every year. I like to save my “FOOTBALL IS BACK, BABY!!!” call for the first Saturday in August in Tuscaloosa. I’m, of course, talking about, what I like to call, The Running Of The Rednecks (also known as the Running Of The Gumps):
This year’s Running Of The Rednecks started early as the dedicated participants arrived well before the gates opened:
I’m not surprised by most of the Bammers showing up four hours before the event started. They needed to get hydrated, focused, and stretched out like any great athlete.
It turned out that this year didn’t start off like ones in the past. Disappointing to say the least:
I’ve spent a lot of time wondering why the gates were opened only to see these Bama fans to not run, but walk to get an autograph from their lord and savior, Jesus Christ Nick Saban. It looks as if they were led on to the field by staffers. A lot of Alabama fans are speculating that this is just one of many new liberal trends in the football program thanks to their new offensive coordinator Brian Daboll, who used to work for the Patriots in that god forsaken blue state of Massachusets.
(I totally made that last part up, but if I didn’t tell you that I made it up you would have totally believed me. That’s why college football is the best sport in the WORLD and you can’t convince me other wise.)
Eventually, the Alabama fans broke loose like Forrest Gump did when he broke off his leg braces and dadgum did they run:
I just want to give a special shout out to the guy who knew he was potentially having a heart attack but kept on running:
Not every person has their Jordan Flu Game, but this Bama fan did on Saturday. Gritty to say the least.
I, also, don’t want to continue without giving him credit for proper ball security. My man might have been having the worst heart pain of his life, but he ain’t forget the 5 proper points of pressure when carrying the ball! His high school football coach would be proud.
If you are wondering why they run, here’s why:
If somebody ever tells you that the whole “football is a religion in Alabama” thing is overblown, show them those photos. That will shut them up reallllllllll quick.
Anyways, I’m ready to say it: FOOTBALL IS BACK, BABY!!!!