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Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher

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(See bonus pictures below)

NebraskaThis week’s married middle school English teacher busted for traumatizing a 16-year-old male student by allegedly arranging to have sex with him is Emily Lofing.

Lofing, 27, taught — until just recently — at Nebraska City Middle School. …

On Monday, local authorities charged Lofing with debauching a minor.

The charge stems from an allegedly scheduled encounter over the summer with the unidentified 16-year-old male for “the purpose of sexual penetration,” …

It’s not clear if the sexual penetration scheduled back in July actually occurred, or if it had merely been scheduled. …

 Lofing began teaching in Nebraska City at the beginning of this year after a previous stint in nearby Weeping Water, about 30 minutes down the road.

She reportedly got married in June 2014.

AndWOWT 6 News obtained an email written at the end of January by the mother of separate Weeping Water teenager. In the email, the mother alerted the Weeping Water school district about what she feared was a sexual relationship between her minor son and Lofing.

The email was sent at roughly the same time the Weeping Water superintendent says the district became aware of “possible criminal conduct by Ms. Lofing” involving “school-aged students.”

State law allows any 16 year-old to consent to sex – even with a teacher.

Sweet mother of Tom Osbourne, Nebraska is coming in on fire! This is how a state achieves Sex Scandal Teacher greatness. You make it quasi-legal for teachers to boink their students. I mean, we’ve got professional educators all across the country facing decades in jail for this stuff. Nebraska doesn’t even make it a misdemeanor. And don’t even talk to me about that “debauching a minor” nonsense. That’s barely even constitutes a moving violation. Any public defender could get that reduced to court costs and community service. Well worth it when you’re a horny little newlywed like Emily Lofing, bouncing from school district to school district in the Cornhusker State, adding notches to her gun belt.

Nebraska is basically offering incentives to the SST industry, the way some states offer tax breaks to encourage manufacturing, movie production or oil exploration. And Emily Loring took full advantage to get multiple kids to lay her the Weeping Water Pipeline.

The Grades:
Looks: Dear Lord. You know how some women are just your type? Like you don’t care what other guys might think, she just hits you where you live? I’ve always called them Wheelhouse Chicks. And that is exactly what Emily is to me. She’s got that Buffy-era Charisma Carpenter thing going. Sort of Geena Davis in her prime, minus the overbite. Possibly even some Alexandra Daddario, if that’s not too much of a stretch. Anyway, I’m starting to ramble. Let’s just say this is an easy
Grade: A

Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: I’ll admit, Mrs. Lofing was in trouble there for a minute. I was worried we were hearing a lot of talk about penetration, but this is a results-oriented blog. Then that mother of the other kid came in from the parking lot with confirmation that 16-year-old was not her first BBQ. We still need some details, so that’ll cost her. But I get the sense we’ll be revisiting this one. After all, no laws were broken,. thanks to those enlightened solons in the Nebraska legislature.
Grade: B-

Intangibles: “Weeping Water” is the best expression for crying we’ve heard since “Makes my eyes rain.” But anyone who worked this hard for some of the teenage D should be called anything but “Lofing.”
Grade: B

Overall: A- And that’s based almost entirely on looks. See you at the end of the year I’m sure, Emily.

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Do you have someone you want to see graded? Tweet her to me @jerrythornton1 with #SexScandalTeacher. And be sure to include photos and a link or it’s of no use. Your service to the betterment of mankind will be its own reward.