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Spineless Speedo Ends Sponsorship With Ryan Lochte, I'm Officially Boycotting Speedo

I don’t even care about the money aspect for Lochte here. I’m sure he’ll be fine “hosting” parties at Wet Republic in Vegas or Senor Frog’s every Spring Break in Cancun. The dude has low rent party promoter written all over him. He’ll make his money basically being an MTV personality/Club promoter until he’s 50 and then he can go broke and write a book about going losing all his money and make a bunch of cash back. It’s basically the perfect retirement plan.

What I do care about though is Speedo being spineless fucks. Yes Lochte exaggerated, yes he probably was way too drunk, but did he do anything THAT bad? Are you really telling me the Brazilian police are the most trustworthy group of people on Earth? Get the fuck out of here with the “we cannot condone behavior that is counter to the values this brand has long stood for” bullshit. What do you even stand for anyway? Rich white kids having spandex bathing suits to swim in? Get off your high horse and stand by your man. Hate when companies bail like this so quickly. You made money from Ryan Lochte being a mimbo all these years and now you’re going to bounce when he pulls the ultimate mimbo move? Well guess what Speedo, you boycott Ryan Lochte, I boycott YOU! You’ll never see me in another Speedo swimsuit again. Write that shit down.