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Olympic Swimmer Jimmy Feigen Forced To Make An $11,000 Charitable Donation To Get Out Of Brazil

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Buzzfeed NewsUS Olympic swimmer Jimmy Feigen has agreed to make a charitable donation of nearly $11,000 in order to be allowed to leave Brazil after becoming embroiled in a dispute over a robbery he and three teammates claimed to have occurred in Rio. Breno Melaragno Costa, his legal representative in Rio, announced that an agreement had been reached with Brazilian authorities following a four-hour meeting with a judge and government officials at a police station on Thursday evening, ABC News reported. Once Feigen has donated 35,000 Reals ($10,800) to Braziian charity Instituto Reacao (Reaction Institute), he will have his seized passport returned and be free to leave the country, Costa said. Feigen had earlier provided a “revised statement” to police after he and teammate Ryan Lochte were indicted on charges of lying about being held up at gunpoint Sunday by robbers impersonating police, the US Olympic Committee said. On Thursday night, fellow US Olympic swimmers Gunnar Bentz and Jack Conger were allowed to leave Brazil after the athletes provided statements to law enforcement officials about the alleged robbery, which police say never happened.

So in the end…American swimmers were forced to give up their money because they were afraid of the Brazilian police. Sounds to me like their story came true. It was more extortion than it was a stickup. There may have not been a gun aimed at anyone, but Jimmy Feigen ultimately was like “Here. Fine. Take this money and let me get the fuck back to America.” And that, my friends, is robbery. These guys were so goddam stupid this became a self fulfilling prophecy. The lesson here is that if you go to Brazil and act like an asshole you’re probably gonna get robbed one way or another.

And thats the thing we cant forget here. Yes, Ryan Locthe is genuinely the stupidest person walking this earth. I think he’s actually an underdeveloped human. Like the missing link between modern humans and the cro-magnons of yesteryear. Their lie was stupid. Them thinking they needed to concoct this story just because of a vandalized gas station bathroom even dumber. But whats getting lost in the sauce right now is that a lot of people WERE getting robbed. Several Olympians actually were mugged. That one Asian pole vaulter got thrown up on and jacked. So my point is lets not get it twisted here – Brazil still fucking sucks. Rio is still trash. Ryan Lochte is as dumb as a goddam chlorine tablet, but hes still an American. Jimmy Feigen and the other idiots are fucking morons for hitching their wagon to Lochte, but they’re still from the United States. And when Brazilian police start getting cocky and flexing their muscles and extorting our boys, well, I dont like that. How about Brazil goes and cleans up all their other fucking shit going on before worrying about some dudes pissing on the floor of a gas station bathroom, huh? How about we clean up the Farvelas? How about we clean up the child prostitution problems? The gang violence? (I’m not sure those are Brazil issues but I’m almost positive they do.) Lets clean up all that other shit before you start shaking down some good old fashioned American morons because a door was broken. You corrupt motherfuckers.

I’ll let my girl Kelly tell it like it is