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Pretty Surprised This Colombian Soccer Announcer Is Still Alive After Holding The 'Goal' Call For 37(!) Seconds

Good Lord. I can’t hold my breath underwater for 10 seconds without going into full spaz mode. This guy could lie in the deep end and goose whoever he wants, for as long as he wants. I don’t think I can be as passionate over anything in life as this guy is about one score. A Kent Brockman this man is not. If anything he better have more potent calls up his sleeve after blowing his load on this goal. It was the bronze medal game in the COPA America Centenario, not penalty kicks for the World Cup championship. Gonna be tough to top this one. But you gotta respect the heart and hustle, though. NEED this Colombian to face off against our hero Argentinian Alejandro to decide whose pelotas swing lower in the South American soccer announcing booth.

Holy heart attack. Breathe, Alejandro, breathe. Without a doubt I need this guy announcing Phillies TV games. Franzke, Merrill, Jimmy J and Zumoff/Tom McGinnis can stay at their respective spots in Philadelphia sports media. We need Alejandro to come in and come in hot with his batshit. At least it’ll make the games watchable. Only caveat is Alejandro would need to keep announcing in Spanish. Shit, he can talk in Klingon for all I care. It’s the passion that counts. Seriously. Need more Un Papa in my life.