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It Is No Suprise That The Chick From Last Night's Finals Game Is An Instagram Model And Appears To Be A Certified Dick Wrecker

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Listen, I understand any decent looking chick that has the brains to start an Instagram account can become an Instagram model. That’s just the way the internet works. But this girl is exactly what I think of when I hear the words “Instagram model”. She is also exactly what I think of when I hear BET Uncut girl (RIP the greatest show ever). That look from last night can set a career in motion. Hell, that look from last night can start an entire war. If you told me that’s the exact look Helen of Troy tossed out before she sparked the Trojan War, I would believe you. That’s Rihanna-level sexiness. Primal and raw as fuck.

And forget about the salary cap or the infamous Pat Riley “Disease of More” theory that usually effects championship teams. Roni Rose is the biggest threat to ending this Warriors run. Because if she ever gets to Steph Curry, she will kill him. He ain’t built for that chick. He is built to drain 30 footers and break ankles. Not to mingle with someone more dangerous than Natasha Henstridge in Species (dated reference, but IDGAF). If we hear sometime in August that Steph Curry is out for the season because his spine snapped in half to the point it punctured his skin, we will know that Roni Rose got her claws into him. Ayesha Curry is the NBA’s classy first lady (while Sonya acts as Queen Bee), but she doesn’t want a piece of Roni Rose. At least that’s what Roni’s Instagram tells me.

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If she has a tongue ring, she’ll probably suck your dick

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If she hangs out with Matt Barnes, she’ll probably murder your dick
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High socks still undefeated on sexy chicks
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And some videos to end the blog.