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Calvin Johnson fails to complete the act of his NFL career

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Calvin Johnson has formally announced his retirement from the NFL, and he doesn’t sound like he’s having any second thoughts.

Johnson, the future Hall of Fame receiver, released a statement through the Lions that was typical for him: Thoughtful, but cautious about not drawing much attention to himself.

“Let me begin by apologizing for making this announcement via a statement and not in person,” Johnson wrote. “While I truly respect the significance of this, those who know me best will understand and not be surprised that I choose not to have a press conference for this announcement. After much prayer, thought and discussion with loved ones, I have made the difficult decision to retire from the Lions and pro football. I have played my last game of football.”

(via ProFootballTalk)

So long Calvin Johnson. Had a pretty decent career but now the real fun starts in Detroit. Be fun to watch Matt Stafford now that he dosen’t have to worry about feeding his Diva Receiva and can get back to running the Cooter-coast offense through Joseph Fauria and Zack Zenner.

Calvin will be remembered for alot of things, but basically only two of them:

-Dropping 1/16th of the TD catches he made when he was triple covered

-Being the last in a long line of WR busts from GM Matt Millen.

Allways struck me that the Lions spending number one picks on WRs was like me spending a bunch of money and time on deciding what types of condoms fit best back when I was in Middle School, and with Mike Williams they literally took a out of shape Trojan. My advise to 10th grade me or Matt Millen would be to focus on getting your braces off, get a haircut, or trade Joey Harrington before you start fantasizing about all the different coverages that are going to be rolled onto your Johnson.

A lot of people will point to the great years he had in Detroit but I woud argue that giving a franchise like the Lions that much hope is actually a dangerous thing. You start winning playoff games and next thing you know people are going to start expecting that you beat the Bills 50% of the time. For a couple seasons, their Thanksgiving games were actually fun to watch and not just because you wanted to avoid your younger cousin who always brought over his legos and cried alot. You had good cop-bad-cop Johnson & Suh stepping on people and dropping spectacular touch downs at a unbelevable clip. The fact that those games were played at 11 AM single-handedly ruined millions of Americans Thanksgiving schedules by making us get morning-drunk and disapointing your grandmother when she comes over at 3:00 PM and you havent even put the turkey in.

In concluson, Megatron is a quitter but his career mirrors that of alot of talented workers in Detroit like Barry Sanders: Drop out of college early, join a union, and then you collect alot of money working for a inferior product and retire early.