Dude Who Looks Exactly Like Bradley Cooper Goes To Sundance And Pretends To Be Bradley Cooper

If I could choose any superpower in the world, this might be it right here: look like a smoke celebrity. What a life this guy must lead looking exactly like Bradley Cooper (not in the “I’m a 40 year old blogger with a big nose who hasn’t shaved in a few days” sense, but in actuality looking like Cooper’s twin). What could be better than it? I guess infinite wealth, perhaps. But my vanity makes a celebrity complexion a lot more desirable than a Midas touch. Any of the other popular superpowers aren’t even a question really. Power of flight? No thanks, I look like Bradley Cooper, I want people to be able to see me. Ability to read minds? I look like Bradley Cooper, the girls are thinking I want to fuck him and the guys are thinking fuck that pretty boy. Superhuman speed? Can’t make out my bone structure if I’m moving by like The Flash.

None of it is even in the conversation. Get me a genie and I guarantee you that’s my wish. Make me look like a beloved celebrity that gets into any party he wants, gets any girl he wants, can get off to himself in the mirror, and never has to pay for a thing. Bingo, bango, my life is perfect.