I Tucked My Tail And Apologized To Twitter

Ugh. Disgusting. I feel like I need to go take a shower. Like Ace Ventura when he realized Finkle was Einhorn.

Just an absolutely nauseating moment to swallow your pride like that. But its like apologizing to your wife even though you know you didnt do anything wrong. Its easier to just say you were sorry and get it over with than to let it linger and make shit more difficult for you. I feel like Nick Saban in that recruit’s living room doing the wobble. Just absolutely mortified that he had to stoop to that level but if you wanna keep up in my industry you gotta be on Twitter. I did it for Shea. For the paycheck. For the Stoolies. I mean if I wasnt on twitter I would have never heard about Lil Kim turning into The Penguin. For the time being, until Twitter is dead in 6 months, I gotta play by their fucking ridiculous rules so I can keep up with the industry.

I’m not proud of what I’ve done. But I’m not a role model. I’m not here to start a revolution. I dont want kids to follow in my footsteps. I’m just here to talk shit on twitter to people who take themselves too seriously and think they are smarter than everyone else. I wish I could quit it, but goddamit its just too much material for me to turn my back completely. I’ll still be on Snapchat with the Middle Schoolers and teeny boppers if you need me, though.

PS – How about the RAMPANT homophobia in Ace Ventura? Imagine that shit nowadays?? The people at the Cauldron would have a heart attack about someone reacting that way to fucking a dude.