Russell Brand's Pubic Hair Has Been Unceremoniously Removed From A London Museum Following His Criminal Conviction

Russell Brand’s pubic hair is no longer on display at a London museum of curiosities following the comedian’s conviction and sentencing for rape and sexual assault.

Viktor Wynd, the eccentric collector behind the Viktor Wynd Museum of Curiosities, Fine Art & UnNatural History in Hackney, confirmed that he removed the unusual artifact from his collection in the wake of Brand’s legal troubles. “I took them straight off display and have no desire to hear his name again – he has no place in my museum of horrors,” Wynd told Variety on Wednesday afternoon.

The removal comes just days after Brand, 51, was sentenced to 10 years and six months in prison at London’s Southwark Crown Court on Monday, Nov. 9. A jury found the former comedian and actor guilty of one count of rape and three counts of sexual assault involving four women, with the offenses taking place between 2004 and 2009, during his rise to fame in British television and Hollywood. He was acquitted of two additional rape charges and one count of attempted indecent assault.

Oh how the mighty have fallen. One day you're married to Katy Perry, starring in a disproportionate number of American comedies while having the the most in-demand pubic hair in Hollywood. The next, you get outed as a sex pest, find god and get sent to British prison. What do they even call it there? The Nick? The chokey? 

Regardless, I am interested in Mr. Wynd's museum. Turns out it has an entire department dedicated to human hair. They got Elvis, a Titanic survivor, a scalp from the old West and more. I get acquiring those at auction, but did he approach brand and demand his bush? Did money change hands? I have a lot of questions about what goes down in the celebrity hair collecting market. Is the hair of a now-bald man like Samuel L. Jackson worth more? Does pre-transplant hair from an actor like Cena or  McConaughey (alleged) worth more than their natural set? I'm also curious how Mr. Wynd disposes of his unwanted pubes. Is this a burning situation or do they just go in the bin? Much to think about....

Whatever the case, this is a headline that makes me even more proud of the founding fathers for breaking away from this wretched isle.