In His Spare Time Elon Musk Just Casually Invented the Flying Car
Scott Olson. Getty Images.Love Elon Musk or hate him:
… you have to concede Musk gets stuff done. He made the electric car popular. Is launching more satellites into space than every other space agency in the world combined, and it's not even close. Starlink is providing internet to the entire world. Neuralink is making it so quadripeligics can operate computers. He's getting us to the moon, as a stepping stone to get us to Mars. All while making a baby every couple of weeks. And just as a little side project when he's bored, accomplishing the very thing he said he'd do eight years ago, as his buddy Joe Rogan laughed in his face:
Rocket thrusters. In 2018, Musk sounded like he was kidding when he said he'd put fooking rocket thrusters on a Tesla. He was not kidding:
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And in case you're wondering, it does have some pep:
There's not a kid among us who didn't have fantasies about living in a future where he has a flying cars. From The Jetsons to Blade Runner to Back to the Future II to Star Wars. Then the future arrived. And all it brought us is a rectangle in our pockets that strangers use to tell us we suck While we're all still stuck in earth-bound metal boxes pulled around by the same internal combustion engines Henry Ford used to build. Everyone complains about not getting the flying cars we deserve. Musk actually used his seemingly infinite resources and did something about it. Just like he said he would.
You crazy son of a bitch. You did it.
There's an episode of Star Trek: TOS where Kirk, Spock and McCoy beam down to some planet looking for some damned thing, and find a guy living there all alone, except for some sex robot he built. (At least that's the implication I always got. They never used a tricorder to test her. But I bet if they put her under black light, she would've looked like a Jackson Pollock canvas.) Soon they figure out that he was not only born on Earth 6,000 years ago, he's spent his immortality living under many different names. Including Methuselah, Solomon, Alexander the Great, Merlin, Leonardo da Vinci, and Brahms, among others. But always a genius who was way ahead of his time, in every lifetime.
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That's the best explanation I have for Elon Musk. It certainly makes more sense than believing he's doing all he does in the same few decades of 24 hour days the rest of us do. He has to have been working on these many projects of his over the centuries. That's all I got. No other hypothesis makes sense.
After all, this is a guy who a year and a half ago was getting hit pieces done on him with headlines like "The Decline and Fall of Elon Musk." Now he's a trillionaire who just made the future we were always promised a reality. Not a bad day's work, given, it's one of about 50 jobs he has.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to my mundane life of writing blogs, telling jokes in nightclubs, and contributing nothing to the advancement of human civilization.