The New Jayson Tatum Era Has Begun By Being So Handsome That It Left Local Media Members Speechless

Boston Globe. Getty Images.

After a brutal 161 days and one of the craziest offseasons in recent memory, Boston Celtics basketball has finally returned as they kick things off tonight against the Cavs. This may be hard for some of you to believe, but I am very, very excited. It's our first look at the New Era Celts following everything that happened over the summer, and even though the games may not be real, the raging Porzingis in my pants that I have just thinking about the Cs being back certainly is. 

For the previous 9 seasons, we lived in the Jays Era. They were the most successful duo not just in the league, but also one of the most successful duos in all of NBA history. Sorry if that offends, it's just the truth. 

Starting tonight and for the foreseeable future, things have shifted. This is no longer the Jays Era. It's the Jayson Tatum Era. This of course means a lot of different things when it comes to the style of play, the roster decisions, the marketing, all of it. It's his show from here on out, which thankfully he's equipped to handle. He has the skill, he has the work ethic, he has the talent, he has the experience, and perhaps maybe most importantly, he's able to mesmerize the media simply by being handsome

Now let me just say, I'm a huge Joe Murray guy. Love Joe. I've been doing Cs hits on his night show for years on 98.5 The Sports Hub, he's been nice enough to have me on this NESN show a few times, so while I'm sure there are some out there that may clown him for this, not me. I get it. 

And let's be honest, Tatum's hairline is elite. In fact, as someone who has a Masters Degree in Haircut Science as it applies to the success of the Boston Celtics, I do not think we should overlook the fact that both Tatum and Paul George are both elite in this department. 

Maddie Meyer. Getty Images.

You may not think this matters, but it does. I've done the research that spans multiple eras of Celtics basketball. From Kelly Olynyk's long hair to Kyrie snapping out of his funk after he got his hair cut, to Tatum feeling top 5 with a fresh cut, to DWhite exploding once he decided it was time to go bald, there is a long history when it comes to this stuff, so you're just going to have to trust me. 

Not to mention, Jayson Tatum is entering this season in INCREDIBLE shape. Finally with a full offseason to work on building his body and getting his strength back, he looks poised for another monster season so of course Joe would be left speechless by seeing how he looks. I will say it is pretty funny to hear this coming from a Boston media member, considering in my experience about 99.9% of 98.5 employees not named Joe Murray are obsessed with shitting all over Tatum for reasons that remain unknown. That'll always be pretty weird to me. I get it's their schtick and all that, but even still. It's weird.

All I know is I can't wait to ask Joe about this the next time I'm on his show. The thing is, he didn't tell a single lie. If you closed your eyes and came up with an ideal franchise player, you'd pretty much be describing Jayson Tatum. One of the best all around players on the planet, one of the best playoff performers in the sport, a Champion, zero drama, and devishly handsome. Some guys just have it all I guess.