China Is At It Again – Public Bathrooms In China Are Forcing People To Watch Ads In Exchange For Toilet Paper

I regret to inform you, that much like YouTubeTV, China is at it again. I've always had a bit of an appreciation for China's willingness to try literally anything. Probably because it doesn't affect me in the slightest. But if you've ever had a crazy/stupid money making idea, or have ever wondered something along the lines of, "Well if we have the technology to do ____, then why don't we use it for [insert something that nobody fucking needs or asked for]". 

If you've ever had a thought like that, you can rest assured that China has already given it a whirl. 

Hot Take: I think watching ads in exchange for toilet paper is a bad idea. It sounds like the slipperiest of slopes, and I don't think America should adopt this particular Chinese idea. Because if they can do it for toilet paper, they're not just going to stop there. While we're forcing people to watch ads in exchange for basic hygiene, we might as well require a second commercial to gain access to the sink. Maybe a third one for paper towels. 

Although I will say, if bars and restaurants were to implement some sort of, "watch a commercial in order to use our restroom for free" system... there might be something to that. Finding a place to take a piss when you're out and about in a city can be a real bitch. You'd think it would be simple, until you really have to go and suddenly realize there are somehow no accessible toilets within a 20-block radius. Then you end up waiting in line at a coffee shop for a black coffee you don't want just to get the restroom code. There's times where I've thought I found a bar I could sneak into, then the bartender clocks me and shouts, "Restrooms are for paying customers only!". 

Then I gotta walk up to the bar, order the cheapest item on the menu, and at bare minimum I'm paying $5 to take a piss. But if Verizon wants to pay bars & restaurants 'x' amount of dollars (or probably cents) for every minute long commercial people watch to unlock the restroom, then I would be able to use the restroom without having to be sneaky about it. It might actually make life a little easier. 

Every year advertisers come up with more and more creative ways to shove their ads down our throats. Good luck getting through this blog without... never mind... (just know the irony is not lost on me). But any day now, places like hotels are going to realize they can make some extra money by forcing their guests to watch an ad before taking the elevator. Or participate in one of those, "Which car insurance commercial makes you least want to scoop your own eyes out with a spoon?" surveys that you see on YouTube.

What about watching commercials in order to take the turnpike? Soon enough, if you don't have an EZ Pass, then along with the $20 it'll cost you to make decent time driving across Pennsylvania, you'll also spend 30 seconds at the toll both learning about the wonders Humira can do for your plaque psoriasis. Speaking of driving, why do we even have red lights anymore? They should all be replaced by LED screens that play commercials for whatever chain restaurant is around the corner. When the commercial ends, and screen turns green, you're free to turn left and proceed to Olive Garden. 

Just spitballing some ideas here for when we inevitably go down this road in a few years. More ads are coming. There was a time where we NEVER thought we'd see the day American sports uniforms were infiltrated by advertisements. But look at us now. Now every Jalen Brunson flop is brought to you by the Las Vegas Sphere.

Newsday LLC. Getty Images.

We're so bombarded with ads nowadays, it's kinda of reached the point where we barely even notice them anymore. Which you might think would make advertisers reel things in a bit. We've certainly reached a point of diminishing returns by now. But in reality, all it's going to do is make them double down even harder. And China might as well just be an advertising test market for the United States. If something works well enough there, it's only a matter of time before we're doing it in America.