"Do You Ever Wish YOU Were Athletic?" The Big Unit Randy Johnson Got Ethered By His Pro Volleyball Daughter Willow Johnson On Her TikTok
I don't have any kids and after sitting through that TikTok, I'm not sure I want any either. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure it's a wonderful experience and I don't think Willow Johnson's video was anything more than a light hearted jab.
But how the FUCK can you look this man in the eyes and ask "do you ever wish you were athletic?" …To THE BIG UNIT??
As Tommy Lee Jones once said to Jim Carrey, "I cannot sanction your buffoonery."
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Look at that arm angle… Feast upon those strikeouts… Good luck catching that 40 year old bone powered home run. Dude could really do it all. A literal UNIT of athletic achievement. So if someone like him is gonna have to sit there and just take junk pitch after junk pitch from an annoying kid, I can't see myself avoiding the same situation someday. And so far in my life I've accomplished nothing, so I have even less of a leg to stand on here. Well other than my triples of the Barracuda, that's gotta count for something right?
But also let's not forget Randy is now a professional photographer too along with being an all-time MLB HoF pitcher. I'm so fucked man. What the hell.
Maybe it's just the circle of life and everyone is destined to be clowned by their kids someday, no matter what they've accomplished. Like I said above, I'm sure it's all in good fun. Actually kinda insane how many losers are going after Willow now for posting this, as if THE BIG UNIT needs White Knights from the comment section to defend him against his daughter.
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RELAX gents. It's not that serious. It's just the internet. She hears you.
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It was cool gaining some knowledge today though. I had no idea Randy Johnson had a D1 volleyball daughter and also didn't know there's a pro volleyball league. That rules.
She's gotta have a nickname by now right? Is Willow Johnson "The Bump Unit"? Does that even apply to her position? Goddamnit I still have so much to learn. Maybe in my next life.
Ah well, YOU GO GIRLS!
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