'Nose Dive': Meghan and Harry Reportedly Lose Their $100 Million Netflix Deal Thanks to 'a Pitiful Plummet in Popularity'

Chris Jackson. Getty Images.

Every time I think I'm out of posting about Meghan Markle and the Artist Formerly Known as Prince Harry? They pull me back in. 

Most recently, it was about Meghan trying to prove to her critics that she was, in fact, pregnant before. Which is an odd enough choice when you've claimed repeatedly all you want is privacy for your family. But becomes nothing short of untreated mental illness when you try to dispel the rumors with a bizarre twerking video that looks nothing like a pregnant human female's belly under your dress:

Prior to that, I was drawn in by the enormous gravitational pull of Meghan's Netflix "reality" show:

The one where she loves to show her audience how much she loves to entertain the friends she loves by lovingly hosting them at the home she loves to maintain. The problem being that it's not her house; it's a TV set. She seems to barely be acquainted with the celebrities like Mindy Kaling who casually pop by the location. And the kids she drones on about because they love the way she displays a fruit salad or whatever, are nowhere to be seen. Presumably because they're where they should be: At their actual home. 

None of which went over with anyone. Not even the target demo of social-climbing wine moms trying to live out some peculiar Perfect Hostess fetish. (No kink-shaming here. This is your safe space, ladies.):

Here's a small sample of the comments under that trailer on YouTube:

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I paused this video at 7 seconds, and read the comments for two hours. That's entertainment. Thank you, America. 

I’ve been a chef for 30+ years and I can tell by how she holds her knife and her under proofed and under cooked focaccia that she has no idea what she is doing 

She added some olive oil to hummus, spun the salad dip plate and now the dish is not ordinary anymore, she elevated it to next level. How much did they pay Mindy to say that being served cake is the most glamourous moments of her life, show seems so fake.

“Surprising people with moments that let them know, I was really thinking of them.”  As she grasps a huge knife to cut through a cake.  Interesting script there.

H & M are like the boyfriend you broke up with who just can’t accept that it’s over. Go away. How many times do we have to say it?

Netflix please feel free to postpone this ridiculous and unnecessary garbage forever. No amount of editing or reshooting will change how utterly repulsed the public is by Meghan Markle. 

And the numbers to demonstrate it's been ratio'd to the Oort Cloud:

Which brings me, at long last, to the reason I've been sucked into posting about Meghan and Harry again. I am saddened, not gladdened, to report their Netflix deal is being quietly canceled:

Source -  Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s five-year Netflix deal will likely expire quietly, experts tell Fox News Digital following reports it won’t be renewed. 

"There are whispers that Harry and Meghan’s Netflix deal will expire quietly. I can’t imagine that either party would want to shout this news over the rooftops. They will hope it’s a smooth transition," British broadcaster and photographer Helena Chard tells Fox News Digital. 

She says the Sussexes' "star attraction has taken a nose dive." …

"The majority of their material has received poor viewing figures and there doesn't seem to be suitable appeal for any new productions starring the duo," Chard adds. "The court of public opinion is key here. The public do not feel kindly toward them. They trashed their family, created a huge amount of damage and monetized off of the back of the attacks."

Royal expert Ian Pelham Turner tells Fox News Digital that the loss of the Netflix deal will be a "major blow" for the couple and could incentivize them to move back to the U.K. as has been a rumored consideration recently. …

I'm going to interrupt here just to add an "Oh NO!!!" to the thought of the happy couple leaving the US and going back to Harry's fairy tale life of castles and prince and princesses. And a taxpayer-funded staff of thousands waiting on them hand and foot. Their every wish a command. I mean, what would we do without them? We need migrants like them to make the under-baked focaccia and salad dip plates Americans are no longer willing to. It continues:

Royal expert Hilary Fordwich agrees that Netflix would prefer the contract quietly expire.

 

"Cancellation is a proper response to ghastly ratings since the only project they produced with financial benefit to Netflix was their initial mudslinging at the royal family docuseries ‘Harry & Meghan,’" she says. "It was rather foolish to have filmed two seasons without even waiting to inculcate the audience response to the first season of MM’s lifestyle show [With Love, Meghan]." 

She adds that audiences were "more interested in lurid royal betrayals than actually anything to do with the couple or high ratings would have continued. Public fascination was merely driven by the controversy and inside royal details being spewed, but neither H nor M themselves have proven to be of interest… Their betrayal of their own family was tasteless and tacky. This negative sentiment was also felt on both sides of the Atlantic, given their pitiful plummet in popularity. " 

Who could've seen this coming? The public losing interest once Harry and Meghan ran out of ways to take a steaming deuce all over the family that gave him a life of ridiculous wealth and privilege. That somehow we wouldn't be captivated by watching a former Deal or No Deal suitcase model sprinkle edible flowers on some sliced fruit to the delight of … herself. That we wouldn't turn away from our billion or so entertainment options to watch a Reality show about a fake princess in a fake house with fake friends saying fake, contrived, scripted things, all saying nothing. Apparently Netflix didn't see it coming. Because they set fire to a 100 million bucks to finance the vanity project of a vapid, clout-chasing, virtue-signalling fame junkie. 

I'd say it was fun while it lasted. But when your show is too terrible to even qualify as hate watch, nobody's having fun. The public has spoken.