MUST WATCH: An All Female Royal Rumble On The Streets Of Dallas Broke Out, And It Was Every Girl For Herself

6/29/2025 12:23 AM

What a slobber knocker.

First off, I know how cautious you gotta be when dropping the “Must Watch” in a blog title around these parts. You can’t just go throwing it around willy-nilly. There are rules here. It’s reserved for the true 1% of videos were fed via this electronic misery machine they call the World Wide Web.

Well, I believe this fight video from last night in Dallas qualifies.

This was the definition of a slobber knocker.

I watched this fight 5 times and still have zero idea who was on whose team. This truly looked like it was every girl for herself, classic Royal Rumble style.

Let’s go to the tape-

First off, we’ll pick up right where the camera man did. I feel like this is where everything took a turn for the worst for white heels. She had black dress on her heels, pushing her back. But she made two grave mistakes here-

First, ladies, I’m far far far from a fight expert, but first thing you have to do when you square up is ditch the heels.

Talk about making your job tougher.

Kick those heels off and get some stable footing.

White heels keeping those heels on definitely did her no favors. (BUT, being a newly found “foot guy”, I do want to tell her I respect her shoe game, and I’m sure her feet looked sexy as hell.)

That was her first mistake.

Her second, was trying to end the fight right away, rearing back with a haymaker, telegraphing the shit out of it, and coming up with air.

Once she whiffed on that monster right hook, she went off balance, and opened herself right up for the easy take down.

Credit where it’s due, black dress seized the opportunity immediately. She pounced like a cat on top, and started raining fists on white heels head.

Just when you thought it was sheets for white heels though, in came red dress from the clouds.

But talk about ZERO help.

She looked about as effective as Paul Bearer (R.I.P.) hopping in the ring to save the dead man from a beat down.

Again, I don’t know how expensive these heels all these ladies had on were, but in this instance you gotta decide between living and having nice heels, and I’m sorry, but the heels have to go every time.

She kept the heels on, hesitated far too long, and then paid the piper.

And by “piper”, I mean the female Kevin Nash.

Talk about a one woman fucking wrecking crew.

Big Sexy here was yanking girls by the hair and flinging them like ragdolls.

First, she made light work of red dress. Tossed her over the top rope like she was a jobber.

Next, she zeroed in on the weakest one in the pack. The one who had been taking the beating from black dress. My girl white heels.

And look at the perfect form here. Gotta respect it.

She picked white heels up by the hair, dog walked her a few steps, and then launched her into another dimension.

But you have to hand it to this girl. She stood right up, brushed herself off, flipped her hair back, and got right back on the line ready for the next snap.

But then she pulled a bush-league move, and instead of going after Big Sexy, moved in on black dress, who was down on the ground fighting somebody else, and delivered this patented Nature Boy cheap shot.

Just when I was about to publicly about how strangely turned on I was by white heels, and may or may not have wanted to suck her toes, she goes and ruins the moment by being a cheap shot artist like that.

But karma came quick for her!

Just when you thought the fight was going to end in a disqualification and the ring judges were going to start ringing the bell, back came Big Sexy with a savage right.