Happy "NCAA Committee on Infractions Hearing Day" To All The Michigan Men* Out There

Well folks, as I sit here in my hotel room in Green Bay, Wisconsin at 5:30 in the morning, waiting for my alarm clock to go off to let me know it's time to shower and go to the Barstool Classic for the day.....I can't help but feel like an 8-year-old kid again. This is Christmas morning. I can't sleep. I have butterflies in my stomach. The day is finally here. What are we going to get from Santa Claus the NCAA Committee on Infractions?

I want the hammer. I need the hammer. People said there was only one possible way for Ohio State to respond to Michigan winning a National Championship, and that was to run it back with one of their own. But could you imagine that after we just put on the most impressive display of football in the history of the sport in back-to-back-to-back-to-back weeks against Tennessee, Oregon, Texas, and Notre Dame…..that when the dust on our trophy begins to accumulate, theirs gets TAKEN AWAY? 

God, if you're out there, I'll do anything. ANYTHING. Take away the title. Send Stalions to prison. Vacate Harbaugh's wins. Publicly shame every coach (and University President) that defended Michigan* to the death, until they ran at the first opportunity they had to leave because they know what they did. Remind their fan base that their savior was on the verge of being fired if "covid" didn't cancel the game in 2020. And then he oversaw the greatest cheating scandal this sport has ever seen. And he….and they….must pay for it.

But unfortunately, if I'm being honest, I think the settlement…..which won't be announced for at least a few weeks….will be underwhelming for Ohio State fans. I think some fines will be handed out. I think Sherrone Moore's hilarious self-imposed Week 2 and 3 suspension will probably turn to Weeks 1-4, maybe even 1-6. And I'm sure there will be some restrictions placed on the program. Do I really think the "hammer" is coming down? Well, I think they will have to admit that they cheated their way to a National Championship if they want to avoid serious issues, and that in itself is all I really need. But no, I don't think the NCAA has the balls to do anything more than that.

I do think Stalions will take the brunt of the punishment for them. Harbaugh knew. Sherrone knew and deleted texts. The whole staff fled and has been suspended or show claused one by one by one. It was a full scale cheating ring. But they're going to throw their little pet (who doesn't even realize it) under the bus and say he went rouge, went to Central Michigan by himself, bought tickets for in-person scouting using his own personal venmo, and then called out play after play on the sidelines….without them ever realizing how he was doing it. Then he proceeded to parade around everywhere from Netflix to podcasts (inbetween receiving 60-70 point ass whoopings as a high school football coach) telling everyone "the truth" while telling people there were things off limits to talk about. Now why is that? I think Stalions is banned for life. I just hope he can fix my vacuum if I ever need a repair.

Anyways, happy Committee on Infractions Day, you cheating scumbags. Hopefully the NCAA still has a little integrity left in them. Drop the hammer and take away the National Championship*