Akron Is Ineligible for a Bowl Game Because the Football Team's Grades Are So Bad

I'm gonna be honest, I didn't know we were still doing the whole grades thing in college football. The NCAA is on its deathbed as an institution, but it's apparently still working tirelessly to make sure the Akron Zips football players are on top of their general studies degrees. And given that they were apparently not hitting the books hard enough, the team is ineligible for a bowl game it wasn't going to make anyway.

Your organization is being trampled to death by every court in America, but at least you nailed Akron and made sure the team that's 15-63 over the last seven seasons has no path to the GameAbove Sports Bowl. That'll show 'em.

I can only imagine how we'll view things like this in 20 years, because the NCAA declaring a team academically ineligible already seems like a weird relic of the past. If any Akron fan feels strongly about overturning this ruling, just sue the NCAA in federal court over it and you'll win. These guys lose every lawsuit they're part of, yet they have somehow found a way to not completely die yet. We're a few years away from players being able to literally stay in college forever, yet we still have paper pushers in Indianapolis checking report cards. Get a real job.

Best of luck to the Zips this year, though. Go out there and win six games to prove everybody wrong.