Jerry Jones Said He Will Be The GM Of The Cowboys Until He Dies (Let's Hope He Lives Forever)

This is just amazing news. While I sorta dig Jerry's attitude about it, his "I bought the team so I can do what I want" approach, we all know it simply does not work. Football is just too complicated for 93 year old Jerry Jones to be calling the shots as a GM. If you really just stop and think about it, it is hysterical his old, geriatric ass is literally the GM of the Dallas Cowboys. Think his 98 year old self can scout, evaluate, or analyze a single thing? Jerry is like how I used to scout in Madden 2004- sort by "fastest" and pick that guy. Trade your draft picks for guys you think are cool. And Jerry makes sure to always have a ding dong of a head coach who will never try to overstep or question anything he does. It is *quite* the way to run a billion dollar business.

And honestly, if you're a Cowboys fan, you're in Hell seeing this. As long as Jerry is alive and the GM, the chances the Cowboys can be good are drastically diminished. And for that reason, I would like the rest of us to pull our resources and see if we can get Jerry to live forever. Does anyone have a magic Genie lamp or anything? If I was given 3 wishes, I am 100% sure that I would use one of them to get Jerry to pause aging right now, live forever, and be the GM of the Cowboys until the Sun explodes. Sorry world peace, but ensuring the Cowboys are bad forever takes precedent. 

Here's to a million more years of this!