It Now Only Costs $2,100,000 To Buy Shohei Ohtani's 50th Home Run Ball

Goldin - Everyone knew what was at stake. Everyone knew what was within reach for a player whose rise to greatness—even dominance—has been unprecedented. Shohei Ohtani was on the verge of achieving a feat in Major League Baseball that no one had ever accomplished before.

Just no one knew how he would achieve it.

Presented is the Official Major League Rob Manfred Jr. baseball used when Japanese superstar Shohei Ohtani established the 50/50 Club on Sept. 19, 2024, with a towering home run against Miami Marlins pitcher Mike Baumann in the seventh inning of the Dodgers' 20-4 victory.

This is a big fuckin story in sports right now because people have evolved into pure insanity with respect to sports memorabilia. Specifically, the Ohtani ball is over $2M now with a little over 12 hours left in bidding and that's just insane to me. 

If Ohtani got struck by lightning and died since hitting 50, I would understand. And if that happened upon impact of the 50th home run ball, it would make even more sense. But he's still very much alive. 

In fact, he's playing in the World Series this Friday

For context, the other team's (Yankees) best player also hit 50 home runs.

So what makes this ball so special? A combination of things in my opinion

1. He's the first player in history to go 50 homers and 50 steals in the same season. There's 150 years of professional baseball so that's a big deal. 

2. He went 6-6 with 10 RBI's the night he hit 50. It was his 2nd homer of the game and is widely considered the single greatest game by any position player over the aforementioned 150 years of pro ball. 

3. He plays in Los Angeles for the Dodgers and that fanbase consists of many rich, fancy, crazy mother fuckers

Even so, is that 2 point something million dollars worth of special? Why not just get some abstract art that will appreciate 500-700% under the next administration alone? 

Rich people are fucking crazy. There's just NO REASON to spend this much money on a baseball without being the child from Blank Check. I refuse to entertain even the most basic, simple arguments towards the alternative. 

I think Cards are different because of the risk/reward in buying and breaking a pack. Like at least there's a dopamine cycle you can stand behind with your obsession. Pokemon people are the same. The rush of not knowing what's behind the next card drives the bus here and I think that's a unique realm of the sports memorabilia kingdom. Card people, while different than me and maybe you, still make sense to me. 

Silent Auction Folks are where you have to keep your head on a swivel. These people cannot be trusted and I can't say that enough. If someone invites you to the basement to see their collection of certified baseballs, there's a strong chance you will never leave that basement. 

This ball is actually made out of human skin

That's where I stand on 2 million dollar baseballs and the people who pursue them: 

In other news, $7.25M gets you the Honus Wagner card and that's actually not a shabby price. 

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Honus Wagner was awesome but that's a different blog. 

For now please just bid responsibly.