Finding Americans Their Premier League Team Based on The NFL: Manchester City Are The Kansas City Chiefs of The Premier League

Alright, let’s dive into this wild but somehow perfect comparison—Manchester City is, without a doubt, the Kansas City Chiefs of the Premier League. They're both good as fuck and have ruined their respective sport. Both teams make the regular season feel worthless because once the games start to matter most everyone already knows whose going to win. 

Let’s start with the obvious. Both of these teams are led by absolute masterminds. Pep Guardiola at City is basically a skinny European Andy Reid. These guys aren’t just coaching—they’re mentally abusing every team they play. Pep’s been redefining how soccer is played, turning football into shit with his Haaland Tap-In Merchant offense, much like Reid has revolutionized the NFL with his pass-happy, Patrick Mahomes merchant offense. They don’t just coach to win; they coach to ruin football. 

If you want to talk about superstars, look no further than these two teams. Patrick Mahomes and Erling Haaland are basically the same human—one just happens to throw footballs, the other hammers them into the back of the net. Both of these dudes are straight-up cheat codes. Mahomes can throw a football while Mintzy-eyeing the jumbotron and still hit a target 60 yards downfield. Haaland? He's the Premier League version of Marshawn Lynch, he just runs through a motherfuckers face and puts goals in the back of the net. 

What makes it even scarier? Both of them are young. Just like Chiefs fans get to watch Mahomes be incredible for the next decade, City fans have the pleasure of watching Haaland break records while making it look so easy it’s borderline disrespectful. Not to mention both teams are chasing dynasty status. The Chiefs have already snagged a couple of Super Bowls under Reid, and City is out here collecting Premier League titles like they’re Pokémon cards. But it’s not just about the trophies—it’s the sense that every year, these teams are favorites to win everything. They set the bar so high that anything short of winning feels like an upset.

There are plenty more examples of similarities between Premier League clubs and NFL teams that the boys and I went over in the latest episode of Pitch Picks. Feel free to check it out, and if you enjoyed it, be sure to like and subscribe!