My Response To The Absolutely Delusional DM Scooter Braun Sent Me At 1 In The Morning
A few days ago, something shocking occurred. Something that I truly cannot believe is reality. No, I’m not referring to this video I made talking shit about Scooter Braun after he inserted himself back into the conversation around Taylor Swift:
I’m talking about the chain of events that happened afterwards. I’m talking about a DM that I received from the devil himself. Speak of him and he shall appear, I guess? I should've known better. Before I show you that, here's a little more background:
I hadn’t planned on watching the "Bad Blood" documentary; like I said in my video, Taylor had nothing to do with it and it feels like a money grab. After this DM, I did. I say this without hyperbole - nothing that I have ever experienced in my life, has been a bigger waste of my time.
The series explains things in parts, one that appears to be about Taylor Swift’s side of things concerning the rights to her music, and the next about Scooter Braun’s involvement. Speaking objectively, it doesn’t make Taylor “look bad,” but she and her fans don’t look good, either. Scooter doesn’t look great in his part (at first), but it becomes transparent almost immediately that this whole “documentary” is a favor to him. Speaking non objectively, it’s an embarrassing attempt at a redemption tour that shows us this man, and his team, have never truly understood their actions.
What it lacks, as do most stories told by those who are trying to spin a narrative for their own gain, is nuance. Do we need a refresher on the word, “nuance?” Here you go:
Arguably the most important factor in any story, ever told. I personally think it’s easiest to tell when someone is lying if a story looks a little too black and white. Nuance of course can sway an opinion on either side, but as everyone knows - the truth is always somewhere in the middle. When a story is being told with absolutely NO room for interpretation, like in this doc…a little too buttoned up, answers for everything; it’s usually a sign that bad behavior (or bigger lies) are being hidden. They’re trying a lot harder to control the story. It’s calculated, and it’s obvious. The signals might as well be searchlights, but somehow Scooter is still surprised when Batman shows up. I call bullshit.
Knowing all of this before even watching the series, I made my video. After seeing it, my thoughts still stand. “A friend” sent it to Scooter, and instead of ignoring it like any normal famous/rich person would do, he decided to include himself back in the narrative he claims so desperately to be “afraid” of, with this DM:
The short form version of events is this: Scooter Braun tried to do a massive business deal that largely benefitted himself, and Taylor Swift outsmarted him. Plain and simple. That’s why this is still eating him up. It’s why he’s been making snide comments for years, and encouraging his other famous friends to do so. He lost, but he doesn’t want to look like he lost. He’d rather Taylor look crazy. That’s why I’m getting Twitter DMs at 1am EST, letting me know that just in case we ever cross paths (LOL) I will be “met with kindness” because my poor, silly little Swiftie brain doesn’t understand “the facts.” Just because something is legal, doesn’t make it admirable OR fair. It’s delusional to expect apathy, let alone praise while you’re trying to pull the wool over someone’s eyes - and getting outsmarted the whole time.
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The real fact is, Scooter, that you’re a fucking douche bag. Don’t you get it? You’re an asshole. I thought that would be obvious when you have “friends” sending you videos of a Taylor Swift superfan telling you to rot in hell (newsflash, that isn’t a “friend”). You can twist and turn your way through whatever new web you’re trying to weave, but you got caught being a scumbag by Taylor Swift, and she didn’t stay quiet about it. Sorry! What did you think was going to happen? You underestimated Taylor, tried to take advantage of a situation, and you got absolutely crushed. Total failure. You played stupid games and won STUPID FUCKING PRIZES.
The sad thing is, if you took the smallest slice, a tinyyyyy sliver of humble pie, stuffed it in your loud ass mouth and admitted it was a lapse in judgement…a low point in your career, even! A moment where you were shaken by the betrayal you made to your own morality! Took time to truly feel the aftershocks of your vile greed-quake and learn something, maybe things wouldn’t be so bad. Instead, we have this mystery “documentary series” being farmed out that exposes just enough of the “wrongs” on both sides, to make it look like Taylor is the villain, yet again for “weaponizing her fans.” Ol’ faithful! Just blame Taylor! Just blame her fans! THEY did the wrong things. THEY took it too far. At this point it feels like tradition.
The main problem here, of course, is that I know he wanted this message out there. He’s not stupid enough to DM a Taylor Swift fan with a Taylor Swift podcast, who works for Dave Portnoy, and think I was going to keep it to myself. It’s insulting, really. To think that I, or someone like me, would be too thick to consider the angles of this from a PR standpoint - as if I/we wouldn't be able to recognize this feeble attempt at manipulation. The pathetic part is, I know he thinks this is like, a slam dunk. He feels like a genius - he’s moved onto marketing with his OWN hatred. Nobody wanted to watch his stupid fluff piece, so now he’s resorted to rage baiting online. The lowest of the fucking low. Desperate, desperate, desperate. If anyone DOES watch it because of this, then they’ll know exactly how to interpret it; as the manufactured toxic sludge that it is.
Instead of soul searching, he's sending condescending…no, that’s not strong enough a word for this particular brand of patronizing - I’d go as far as to call this message HAUGHTY. Haughty DMs, from his ivory tower in like, what, Malibu? Yawn. Get a fucking life, dude. It’s disappointing to see such a lack of growth in so much time. 2019 was FIVE years ago! The world was a completely different place! Yet somehow, our disdain and his immaturity still made it through COVID unscathed.
There are like, what, 3 celebrities who have ever openly talked shit about Taylor? All of whom did something scummy to her first, or completely unprovoked? On the flip side, I can’t even begin to write the amount of stories we’ve heard from countless others, celebrity or not, who have met her. She’s a kind, genuine, smart person. She’s humble, she’s generous, and she cares about her fans, her work and her integrity. People go OUT OF THEIR WAY to praise her talent and her character. Any time she has needed to show strength against someone, the first thing they do is try to tear her down…which is exactly what Scooter did, and continues to try to do. Backed into a corner and lashing out. Absolute tell-tale sign of some wrongdoing. God Scooter, really, you’ve given so many signs.
For once, without worry in my bones, I sincerely hope Taylor sees this. Not to upset her, not to annoy her, not to get her to notice me (hey girl!) - but so she can have a good laugh. A right old chuckle at the fact he is still clawing at the cap of the 2 liter Coke bottle that he threw himself into, while the Swifties shake it off up until it explodes. Congrats! Your name is back in the news! Is it everything you dreamed of?
So, there's my message to The Smallest Man In My DMs. I see through your bullshit, you've embarrassed yourself yet again, and I strongly advise you go back to fading into oblivion. Make your money without Taylor's name on your fucking lips, and leave the Swifties alone - we'll gladly do the same.
Check out our new episode of Taylor Watch, where Gia and I get even more in depth about this whole situation.