Paul Skenes, Future Cy Young Winner And Livvy Dunne's Boyfriend, Made His MLB Debut And Was As Good As Expected

Listen, I don't know shit about baseball. I'm a bandwagon Dodgers fan and I'm okay with that. But what I do know is pageviews, and Paul Skenes may be my Mona Lisa. That's partially from being the top pitching prospect and partially because his biggest fan is his the queen of NIL and fellow LSU star Livvy Dunne who we've written about no less than 472 times over the last year:

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Some guys have it all and it must be nice to be able to perform on and off the field at an elite level. If you want to know more about his on the diamond performance, go read about it from someone who knows ball like Hubbs. But anyway, Skenes showed up and immediately struck out 2 batters in the first inning, and besides a solo shot from Hoerner in the 4th, basically dominated before getting into a little trouble in the 5th inning which got him pulled. He finished with 4.0 IP, 6 hits allowed, 3 earned runs and seven strikeouts on 84 pitches. What can't this fucking guy do?

The broadcast are just like Barstool bloggers and they want numbies too, so they had Livvy on to talk about how her and Paul have been preparing:

There's always talk about how you perform under the brightest lights when there "baddies in the crowd" like Jordan Poole in the NBA, and there might not be any brighter lights than pitching with Livvy watching. Is this good?

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The Pirates are in good hands.