Lighten the Fuck Up! Christmas is 'That Special Time of Year', but WOOD the Kid Get Lucky?

A 17-year-old kid walked into the local big-box pharmacy and was browsing the isles looking for something to bring to his girlfriend's house for Christmas…

A uniformed clerk approached him and asked if he needed any help. The kid answered excitedly, “I’ve been invited to Christmas dinner at my new girlfriend’s house. Afterward, I'm hoping to get lucky…”

“Well then, how about condoms?" the clerk asked in a helpful tone. "They could come in handy. Here’s a single. Good to carry one in your wallet just in case you do get lucky on Christmas. It is that special time of year…” 

After paying, the kid was walking toward the door when he suddenly stopped, smiled to himself, turned back, and said to the clerk, “You know what, my girlfriend's mom is smokin' hot. I think I’ll take another one, just in case I get really lucky! You're right, Sir, Christmas is that special time of year, and I've got to be prepared…”

On Christmas Day, the kid was sitting at his girlfriend's dining room table with her family, silent, barely touching his food, and not making eye contact with anyone… 

After a while, his girlfriend kicked him under the table and whispered, “If I had known you were gonna be so quiet, I wouldn’t've invited you to Christmas dinner with my family!”

The kid paused for a moment, then looked at his girlfriend and said, “And if I had known your dad worked at the pharmacy, I wouldn't've bought condoms from him either!”

Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968! This is LTFU Joke #220!

Just in case you missed the last one…