Advertisement

Watch: Deer Spears Tourist with Antlers, Phone Goes Flying, Broken Ribs Everywhere

There's no reason I should be cheering for this deer. Deer's are dumb ass holes. Some of the dumbest animals on the market. They never look both ways when crossing the street. One time a deer ran in front of my dad's Ford Taurus when we were on the way to a hockey tournament back in 2001. Didn't even have the decency to cross at the designated deer crossing. It totaled the car and everything. I missed the whole first period, and I've been terrified of hitting deer while driving ever since. And they're wildly overpopulated. By all means it should "fuck deer".

Also, I don't know this man. He appears to be a perfectly nice, normal person. I have no reason to wish broken ribs upon him. It's not like he was fucking with the deer too bad. I guess he was kind of up in its space, following him around, trying to get close. He wasn't pointing a rifle at it, or poking it with a long stick, or insulting Bambi. But the rule of thumb is that you don't fuck with wild animals. 99% of the time, animals are more scared of you than you are of them. However, every once in a while, you'll come across an animal that's up for a fight. This deer was up for a fight. 

When the deer went antlers first into this man's rib cage I thought, "hell yeah". Good job deer. Don't let this man take an innocent picture of you. You didn't consent to that. If a deer walked up to him with a camera and said "smile bitch", I bet he wouldn't like that much at all. He'd probably faint out of shock over the fact that a deer was holding a cell phone and speaking English. So good job deer. Way to stand your ground. That's your beach.