The Giants Need To Bring Odell Beckham Jr. Back Home After He Flawlessly Pulled Off A Big Daddy Costume With His Son
I'm publishing this roughly one hour before the NFL trade deadline but if longtime Stoolie Joe Schoen is listening, he needs to trade for Odell Beckham Jr. simply because of his costume. I know at face value that seems like a ridiculous thing to say. But Odell did a better job with that costume in terms of creativity, execution, and attention to detail than anything the Giants offense has done this year not to mention that none of the 100 receivers on the roster have stepped up to be a WR2 let alone a WR1.
Okay, I hate lying to you guys. I don't actually know if a really good costume is worth shipping out future draft picks in exchange for an oft-injured wide receiver that would have the entire local media monitoring his every movement. But I didn't want to blog the 1,000,000th headline in Barstool history that said a famous person won Halloween, so I went with the oldie but goodie "The Giants should trade for Odell" headline since Big Blue fans asking for Odell to come back has been an annual tradition ever since The GM That Shall Not Be Named traded Odell after saying he didn't re-sign Odell to trade Odell.
Blogger's Note: Fuuuuuuck that guy
Anyway, the biggest takeaway in all this is that kids make Halloween so much better. Not just because you get to go trick or treating again without looking like a weirdo and can steal all their candy because they are dumb little humans without fully formed brains. But because it allows a whole new world of costumes you can do with them as a big person with a little person, or in my case extra extra big person because I believe all units should dress up as units. I've been Thanos when my kids were Gamorra and Drax, Donkey Kong to their Toad and Toadette, and this year will be Winnie The Pooh to their Piglet and Tigger.
Is this little life perk worth the complete and utter destruction of your mental, physical, and financial well-being? Fuck no. But it takes a little sting away from all that once every 365 days if you hit a home run like Odell did with little Zydn (Finding out Odell's kid has an Instagram account as a toddler was 0% surprising to me).
Also for what it's worth, I think Big Daddy was an elite Adam Sandler movie while also having it as the number 4 on my Mount Rushmore of Sandler movies. Billy Madison is number one since it's my favorite comedy ever, with Happy Gilmore coming in at a very close second, which I feel is pretty common for most people. The Wedding Singer is my number three since it is maybe the greatest period piece in cinematic history and I believe it may be the most underrated comedy of all-time. And Big Daddy is solidly at four, a tier above every other Sandler movie that I liked, disliked, or hated (Little Nicky is when I started losing interest in the Sand Man's movies). Even though I don't think it was meant to do so, Big Daddy does almost as good a job summing up life in the late 90s as The Wedding Singer did with the 80s, with the trailer for the movie taking me back to when life was simple when I was living in AOL chat rooms without a care in the world or a bill to pay.
