Marcus Freeman Got to Live Every Coach's Dream by Grilling a Reporter About HIS Terrible Playcalling in Youth Football

Bryan M. Bennett. Getty Images.

If there's one common denominator that binds together the fraternity of professional football coaches, it's that they all hate the press. Some hide their contempt better than others. Some are almost convincing when they act collegial at the podium, like somehow they enjoy the back-and-forth and have respect for the role the media plays in generating fan interest in the sport. But make no mistake, it is an act. The last thing you want after making a 100,000 decisions during the week and in-game and things go tits up is to have to explain yourself to a room of people whose only qualification to question you is a Bachelor's in Journalism. If coaches honestly and truly enjoyed the process, then the NFL and NCAA wouldn't have to make press availability mandatory; they wouldn't be able to keep these guys away from the podium. 

That's true even for college coaches, despite the fact they largely get treated like demigods by the people who cover them. Take for example, Marcus Freeman at Notre Dame. I think it's a safe bet that with his team coming off a big rivalry win over USC, ranked 14th in the nation and one spot above his duplicitous, back-stabbing predecessor Brian Kelly's LSU, that things are going pretty well for him. And when he takes questions from an outlet like Irish Illustrated, he's probably not getting the kind of treatment a Big Tobacco executive would expect while sitting across from Mike Wallace. 

But as it turns out, in the small, rural, college town reality of South Bend, that the Irish Illustrated reporter who attends Notre Dame's pressers just so happens to be the coach of Freeman's son. And as a sports dad, he had questions of his own. And they were brilliant:

“My turn? Okay. Two things, alright. Second-third grade championship game, okay, two trips to the red zone, zero points, one play was a reverse pass that was intercepted in the red zone. You were the offensive coordinator there? Thoughts on the red zone play calling. …

"Last question. There was a Nico Freeman in that same game who had a long run that was negated by him only having one flag on. Who's responsibility is it to make sure the young man has two flags on?"

If you're the head of a football program, this is like going to Fantasy Camp. This would be every coach's Make-a-Wish if they did them for grown men.When humankind develops a Star Trek-like Holodeck, this would be the program every football coach chooses. 

Freeman getting to sit there an pick apart his kid's coach is the equivalent of a comic bringing a heckler up on stage and letting him have the mic. (Note to every comic from now until the end of time: Do not ever do this. It's gone horribly wrong every time it's been tried.) It's his chance to say, "You think this is so easy, how about YOU try it?" And enjoying the pure Schadenfreude of watching them fail at something you're one of the best in the world at. 

One last word for this Tim O'Malley guy, from someone who's been there. When you're coaching youth sports and get questioned by a parent, don't ever explain, don't ever apologize. Remember, it's a pecking order. They are to you what the press is to professional coaches. If they could coach it better than you, they'd be out there instead of you. Breathing dust in the heat of August practices. Standing out in the rain in September. Freezing their nuts off under the lights in October. Giving up their weekends to drive 45 minutes each way and spend three hours at the field. All for zero dollars and zero cents, but maybe a $50 gift card to the sports pub at the breakup party. While you'd be the one dropping your kid off at the practice field and heading home for a beer. Then you'd be the big football brain who never made a wrong decision. Because you never made a decision. 

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So good on Freeman for giving this reporter a little dose of what it means to be the Man in the Arena. Coaches everywhere salute him. And my guess is he just guaranteed his son about 30 carries next week.