Advertisement

The Internet Remains Undefeated as it Appears We Have Found Deshaun Watson's Pathetic Burner Account

Deshaun Watson may be in the throes of becoming the biggest waste of money, guaranteed money, and draft capital in NFL history:

But just because the humiliation seems to be about as bad as it could possibly be, that it can't get even worse:

Source - Internet sleuths believe Watson created a burner account, @Gainsvillesown, after the Browns’ 26-22 loss to Pittsburgh on Monday night.

The account’s handle references Watson’s home of Gainesville, Ga. — albeit spelled wrong — and defended the quarterback, who struggled Monday. …

A disappointing loss fuels frustration from fans, and some took to X (formerly Twitter) to lay on the scrutiny.

Advertisement

Advertisement

Here's more of the incriminating evidence:

Now is this rock solid, irrefutable proof that Gainsvillesown is Deshaun Watson and Deshaun Watson is Gainsvillesown?

No. No, we cannot say that definitively at the moment. The crack team as CSI:X will have to do further investigation. 

But you have to admit, it's all suspicious to make him a Person of Interest. If not the prime suspect. His fingerprints are all over this account.  

First, Gainsvillesown fits the profile. There can't be a lost of suspects left in that small, ever-dwindling subset of the population still defending him. Whoever the guilty party is, he's certainly consistent in his modus operandi; every post pinning the blame on his offensive line. Plus they're all written with the identical tone, voice and writing style that you don't have to be a cryptographer to realize they're all written with the same hand. In other words, we can rule out a copycat X/Twitterer.

And above all else, in order for us to make a positive ID on Watson, we need to establish that he had motive, means, and opportunity. Check. Check. And checkmate. 

We're two games into Deshaun Watson's season. And it's fair to say that not only has he not hit rock bottom yet, it's nowhere in sight. Book him on felony charges of Possession of a Burner Account. See you in court, Gainsvillesown.