American Horror Story: Stephen King Says His Wife Almost Divorced Him Because He Used To Play "Mambo No. 5" Nonstop
EW- Stephen King has crafted some of the most chilling tales of the past 50 years, but nothing quite sends shivers down the spine like a recent revelation made by the Master of Horror. In a new interview with Rolling Stone promoting his latest novel, Holly, King confirms that he is indeed a Begahead. In fact, he's such a fan of Lou Bega's 1999 summer bop "Mambo No. 5" his wife nearly mamboed out of his life.
When asked if the Bega rumors are true, King responds, "Oh, yeah. Big time. My wife threatened to divorce me. I played that a lot." "I had the dance mix," the Misery writer continued. "I loved those extended play things, and I played both sides of it. And one of them was just total instrumental. And I played that thing until my wife just said, 'One more time, and I'm going to f---ing leave you.'"
Out of all the horror stories Stephen King has ever told, this may be his most fucked up one, which is obviously saying something. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not here to shit on Mambo No. 5 because it was a certified banger that can still get the party going, even if it's the only hit Lou Bega ever churned out as Mambo's 1-4 and 6-10 were absolute flops (this was my dad joke for the day).
That being said, you cannot convince me that Stephen King wasn't trying to make his wife go insane like Jack Torrance from The Shining by filling her life with all Mambo No. 5 and no play. No matter how much you love a song, there is a point where any song goes from great to good to fucking hell if it is played nonstop. I'll never forget or forgive a group of girls I was friends with ruining "Summer of 69" for me by playing it at least 20 straight times at a party back in the day. I didn't know it was possible to grow sick of any Bryan Adams masterpiece, let alone his finest work (no disrespect to the absolute smash hit Everything I Do). Yet I have never felt the same about "Summer Of 69" since that fateful night.
Now take that sort of experience, multiply it by a million because your husband is playing a lesser song nonstop, and you have actual grounds for divorce if not criminal charges. Again, I'm not shitting on a very fine song by Lou Bega. But you can almost make a case that the instrumental of Mambo No. 5 sounds like something you would use in Guantanamo Bay to torture terrorists by playing it on loop.
If you think waterboarding is bad, try having your ears soundboarded by THE TRUMPET every day of your life. I always figured anybody that married a sick and twisted brain like Stephen King had be at least little off her rocker. But even that woman has her limits.
Also for what it's worth, I looked up the Mambo No. 5 dance Remix and I can't help but want more out of it.
