The Water Wars Continue After Dolphins Attacked Four Humans Swimming In The Sea Of Japan

BBC- Four swimmers have been injured in dolphin attacks on a beach in central Japan, officials say. One man, in his 60s, suffered broken ribs and bites to his hands after a dolphin rammed him a few metres off Suishohama beach in the town of Mihama, Fukui prefecture, early on Sunday. 

Another man, in his 40s, sustained arm bites in a separate incident on the popular beach the same morning. Two more people were injured by the mammals later in the day. Fukui has now recorded six such attacks this year, local police say.

Alright, I'm calling it now. The Water Wars have officially begun. In fact, you can make a case that they started a while ago considering this is not even close to the first time a human has been attacked in the water this year, as we have blogged about very often here. But sharks have had the killer gene in their body (along with feelings) since dinosaurs walked the Earth and the orcas that have been going viral for attacking humans the last few months literally have the word killer in their nickname Killer Whale. However, once lovable dolphins start taking down a handful of swimmers in one day, there is clearly something bigger taking place. 

To be honest, I don't blame this (Googles what a group of dolphins is called) pod of dolphins for unleashing fury on humans swimming in the Sea of Japan considering that crazy fuckhead Kim Jong Un continues to fire missiles at their peaceful aquatic home for no real reason. Not only that, but it appears that word of the war has spread to the marine life in captivity.

Again, I have no problem with these animals fighting back because God knows how much damage mankind has caused to the seven seas during our reign atop the food pyramid and not fighting back would actually be the coward's move by the creatures that survive in the pressure cooker that is living in the big blue. I don't even think we can really fight back in this war because I feel like killing a bunch of innocent animals on top of the ones we already fish and eat is excessive. But just know the next time you are in the water that there's a war going outside no man is safe from. It don't matter if you are three feet or eight one. Cam'ron said that so you know it's true.

P.S. As always, The Simpsons did it first.