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Is Indiana Jones 5 Worth Your Time? Here's A Pro/Con List To Make Your Decision

Archaeologist Indiana Jones races against time to retrieve a legendary artifact that can change the course of history.

Indy 5 has been a bit of a rollercoaster for me. When I initially heard the news, I was out. I had no interest in watching Disney beat the corpse of Harrison Ford into the ground for some cash. Then they hired James Mangold to direct. This is a dude that has made some serious bangers in 'Copland', '3:10 to Yuma', 'Ford v Ferrari' and, most importantly for this movie, 'Logan'. The reason it's so important is that 'Logan' was not only one of the best comic book movies ever made but the perfect sign off for a well-respected legacy character in Wolverine. I want that for Indy! I don't want that shitty Crystal Skull to be the last time I see him. Then, the first trailer (see above) hit. 

Not exactly what I would call promising. Looked a little overwrought with CGI which was exactly what killed Crystal Skull. Then the reviews started coming in after Cannes and they were pretty negative across the board. Then the SECOND wave of reviews came in and they were a little warmer! So I went into the movie with tempered expectations and here is what I found. 

PROS: 

- It's got a whole bunch of the classic Indiana Jones cat-and-mouse between him and Nazis. That is the highlight of the two best movies in the franchise, Raiders and the Last Crusade. 

- One of my biggest worries was the fight scenes. Harrison Ford is a billion years old so there is definitly a hard cap on the level of action I'm willing to believe as an audience member. Honestly, it wasn't as bad as I feared. There are definitly moments where they toe the line and gave me an audible "ehhhhhh" but nothing I remember as wildly egregious. 

- The de-aging of Harrison Ford was also a major worry for obvious reasons. As someone who is overly-picky about CGI, I think it honestly looked pretty crisp. There are certainly points you will notice it looking off if you are LOOKING for them but I was otherwise happy to see a younger Indy killing Nazis one last time. 

- I liked most of the new characters. Phoebe Waller-Bridge is clearly meant to be a near carbon copy of Marion in Raiders, which isn't necessarily a bad thing.  I'd argue that Marion was one of the most badass female characters in cinema because, unlike with a lot of modern movies, her purpose and entire identity as a character didn't revolve around her having to be a "badass female character". PWB is not on the same level and is a little miscast but I liked her additions to the movie. Mads Mikkelsen is, as you can imagine, a great villain with some incredible goons at his side as well. 

- As always, John Williams score is out of this world. It really hit and gave you that nostalgic, Indy feeling. 

- There is some really great stuff in this movie for history nerds. Lemme tell you what, this movies third act lets you live out a nerds dream and will have you in a wiki rabbit hole the minute you leave the theater. 

CONS

- It's bloated. Clocking in at 2.5 hours is wayyy too much and I felt like Mangold could have easily chopped a half hour out of it. 

 - Speaking of what could have been cut, It makes some attempts at a deeper emotional tether which wasn't necessary. That isn't what Indy is built on. It's action, adventure and the occasional abridged romance. Probably the deepest we got in the franchise was Indy and his dad but that also played into the story perfectly. 

 - There is another attempt made at the spunky child sidekick character which feels insane after the reception of Short Round in Temple of Doom. Fair or not, the fact remains that Indy fans were by-and-large not into that. And the new kid is written wayyyyy worse than Short Round. Essentially overpowered which is an eye roller. 

SUMMARY

Is Indy 5 a perfect movie? No. Does it even come close to Raiders or The Last Crusade? Absolutely fucking not. However I had a fu-ass time with it. I found it leagues above the bullshit of Crystal Skull but still below Temple of Doom, which I probably like more than others. There will be some of you that hate it but I think a lot more of you will be surprised that a viable Indiana Jones product was made in 2023. 

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