Lighten the Fuck Up! He Was Sitting Alone at the Bar When a Gorgeous Young Woman Approached Him...

A 75-year-old man entered a hotel lounge and sat alone at the bar. After a few minutes, a gorgeous young woman approached him and whispered in his ear that she was a prostitute and asked, "Would you like to have a good time, Sir? If you do, it's three-hundred dollars…" 

The old man, a widower for many years, smiled and replied, "Why yes, that's exactly why I'm here…" 

They went up to her room, and after he paid, they immediately stripped and then climbed into bed, where the old man performed like a young sailor. The prostitute, amazed at how energetic and agile he was for his age, told him if he could do it like that again, she'd give him one for free. 

He enthusiastically replied, "Hell yeah! I can do it just like that again, but I'll need to take a 20-minute nap first, and while I'm asleep, I'll need you to hold my Johnson tightly with both hands…" She agreed.

He woke up 20 minutes later, and the two went at it again, just as vigorously as the first time. 

The prostitute was amazed at the old man's stamina, so unlike her other Johns, and offered him another freebie provided he could repeat his performance a third time. The old man told her that he needed to take another 20-minute nap before round three, and while he slept, she'd have to hold his Johnson tightly with both hands… 

She did as he asked, and he woke up 20 minutes later, and they went at it a third time, and with even more vigor than the first two. 

After finishing, the prostitute caught her breath, and needing to satisfy her curiosity, asked the old man, "I can understand you needing a nap, Sir, but why do I need to hold your Johnson with both hands while you're asleep?" 

The old man smiled and replied, "Oh… That's just so you don't steal my wallet…"

Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968! This is LTFU joke #162!

Just in case you missed the last one…