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Tom Brady Can Finally Get Around To Rebuilding His Business Empire After That Scumbag Sam Bankman Fried Reportedly Cost Him $50 Million

While my colleagues were reminiscing about putting it all on the line for Tom Brady/how important he was to Barstool, my first thought when I heard about the GOAT retiring for good (imagine if this was just all part of another Hulu ad deal, though?): time for TB12 to build… well, rebuild his business empire.

You might recall that Sam Bankman Fried and that chick that ran Alameda Research (that I always get mixed up with the police officer who banged every dude in her precinct) made Tom look like a sorry excuse of a businessman.

A while back I wrote a blog about how SBF fucked Brady better than Gisele or Veronika ever could...

According to estimates, Thomas held 1.1M shares of FTX. While it’s hard to exactly value the stock, Forbes estimates Tom’s chunk of FTX was worth ~$45 million...

NY Post - Tom Brady could face a bumpy retirement when it comes to finances, as the NFL legend struggles to disentangle his budding business empire from troubled crypto ventures including the doomed FTX exchange. 

Last month, court filings revealed that Brady held more than 1.1 million common shares of FTX at the time of its bankruptcy, while Bündchen has more than 686,000 common shares. Forbes estimated that Brady’s stake was worth $45 million before FTX’s collapse rendered it worthless. 

To add insult to injury, Tom is being sued for his part in promoting FTX. Perhaps he shouldn’t have pretended to be friends with a grown man that uses “heh” in casual online conversations?

But that’s not the only way SBF did the GOAT dirty. He also helped him launch Autograph, an NFT project that had become, objectively an absolute dumpster fire. It’s safe to assume Tommy Football lost a yuge chunk of whatever the fuck he poured into that.

NY Post - Brady also co-founded the NFT marketplace Autograph — a platform that once counted Bankman-Fried as a board member and drew steady interest from investors before a tech-sector meltdown upended various crypto-focused startups.

Autograph didn’t avoid the industrywide slump. In December, the Brady-backed startup cited “challenges of the market” after it laid off “dozens” of employees, [an absolutely pathetic publication] reported. Bankman-Fried’s name also quietly disappeared from Autograph’s website, though the exact timeline for his exit from the board wasn’t clear.

And before you say “ToM is DoInG juSt FiNe”… yes, no shit. Forbes estimates that his total earnings and endorsements top half a BILLION dollars. That means SBF took him for ~10% of his total income. 

Sure, Brady’s will be aight financially, but this has gotta hurt for a Michigan Man that had planned to work in financial services if being the best football player ever didn’t work out. 

I wish him the best of luck in becoming a business, man… not just a businessman. 

PS - Fuck SBF

PPS - Every day I send The Water Coolest, Barstool's daily business and markets newsletter, to a few hundred thousand Stoolies/serious investors/crayon eaters. It hits your inbox at 6 AM and covers all stories you need to know (not just Tom Brady news). 

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