Justin Jefferson Showed Up For Today's Game Against The Commanders Straight From The Year 2122
Poor Ron Rivera, man. First news comes out that Daniel Snyder is looking into selling the team, which is a move that Rivera will almost definitely not benefit from since a new owner will probably want a new head coach like almost every new owner does. Now he has to deal with maybe the best receiver in football showing up with gear from the future.
It's hard enough to game plan for Justin Jefferson when he is wearing normal equipment approved by the NFL and Roger Goodell's stooges. But I imagine it's impossible to game plan a guy with Jefferson's talent while he is wearing A-Train's goggles from The Boys (I've never seen any of the critically acclaimed Spy Kids movies but this meme plays).
As well as any Christian reference
Not even Snyder's shitty turf at FedEx Field is going to be able to slow Jefferson down, especially since Kirk Cousins will be fueled by revenge for the franchise that allowed him to cash the fuck to the tune of $231 million in thanks to their ineptitude of dealing with his contract.
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Okay, maybe Kirk won't be feeling too vengeful today. But I'm sure working for a dickhead boss like Daniel Snyder came with few things that will make him looking for revenge, with plenty of yards and touchdowns going to Justin Jefferson.
TL;DR I will responsibly be betting the Over for all Justin Jefferson props on the Barstool Sportsbook.