A Woman Who Spent Days in the Hospital When Her Dog Pooped in Her Mouth as She Slept Still Hasn't Put the Thing Down for Some Insane Reason

Source - A British woman spent three days in the hospital after her daughter’s dog defecated in her mouth as she slept. 

Amanda Gommo, 51, was taking an afternoon nap when pet chihuahua Belle became ill and suffered sudden diarrhea.

“I was having my afternoon nap with Belle, like I always do, when I suddenly felt something squirt in my mouth,” Gommo told South West News Service.  “It was disgusting, and I was hurling violently for hours after. I just couldn’t get the taste out of my mouth.”

Gommo’s daughter took Belle to the vet where the pooch was diagnosed with a nasty stomach bug. ...

The British woman phoned for an ambulance before she was rushed to a local hospital. 

There, doctors diagnosed her with a gastrointestinal infection that had been passed through Belle’s feces into her mouth two days earlier. ...

“I’ve forgiven Belle for her little accident and I still love her with all my heart,” Gommo stated. “But I will definitely be more mindful of what position we sleep in in the future!”

Allow me to give Amanda Gommo a little advice, one 50-something to another. There is only one way to deal with a situation that involves waking up with dog diarrhea in your mouth. And while this may come as a shock to her, it is not taking a selfie with canine runs streaming down your face and then sharing it all over the internet. And it's not calling the vet. It's certainly not forgiving and forgetting. 

It's taking Old Yeller out back behind the barn with a quarter pound of hamburger stuffed into the end of your shotgun and give him a taste of Frontier Justice. 

I can hear the people who love dogs better than they love people crying about my animal cruelty and talking about me like I'm the bastard child of Michael Vick and Cruella de Vil to dare suggest such a thing. But who's the cruel one, me or Belle? 

Strike that. I withdraw the question. This isn't about cruelty; it's about nature. It's about the cold, heartless, struggle to survive that we all live every day, and which Nature is indifferent to. Belle might be a little, hairy, wingless bat. But somewhere in her lurks the call of the ancient wolf. There are millions of years of evolution coursing through her rapidly beating heart, desiring dominion over all she surveys. Predators. Prey. The pack. Even the hapless human too stupid to be aware that she's in a struggle for dominance in the very bed she provides for this beast. 

Taking a dump is the most natural of common experiences all living things share. And from the top of the food chain to the bottom, we all intuit that it's filthy and disgusting. No creature craps in another's mouth "accidentally." Or stops once they realize their victim will take it. Once Belle takes a shit in your mouth, she owns you. You are the Beta to her Alpha. Your forgiveness confirms it. Your kindness is a weakness. No different than the caribou in the herd with a limp.It begins with her squatting over your mouth while you blissfully dream. It ends with her ripping your jugular out and devouring your innards as you watch. It may be a matter of years, or months, or even weeks or days. But sooner or later, the meal Belle will be shitting in that bed will consist entirely of Amanda Gommo's remains. 

I say take her out before she takes you out, Amanda. You can thank me after. Though not with a kiss. I'm all set on that.