Lighten the Fuck Up! He Left NYC for the Adirondacks & Was Invited to a Wild 4th of July Party in the Mountains...

Getty Images.

A career Wall Street stockbroker was burnt out and decided to go off the grid completely. He had enough of that dog-eat-dog lifestyle, the stress, the non-stop rat race of NYC, the constantly fluctuating stock market, and his many irate clients.

So, he decided to leave New York and buy a cabin in a remote part of the Adirondacks where his closest neighbor was miles away on a neighboring mountain. Pure solitude, nature, zero cell phone service, no electricity, exactly what he wanted…

Months passed and he had zero contact with anyone. He liked it, but he was getting a bit lonely.

One day his neighbor from the neighboring mountain paid him a surprise visit. He was a huge, burly mountain man. In a gruff, but reasonably friendly voice, and pointing across a valley he said, “Hi neighbor, I live on that mountain over there and I noticed that you’re new to the area, so I thought I’d introduce myself and invite you to my annual 4th of July party.”

The former stockbroker was thrilled at the idea of finally having a little socialization and gratefully accepted. “Sure, I’d love to come to your party.”

“I have to warn you though, we do a lot of heavy drinking at these parties, they can get pretty wild!" the huge mountain man confessed.

“I used to work on Wall Street. I’m no stranger to heavy drinking,” the stockbroker replied.

“Well, I have to also inform you, there’s usually a lot of drugs as well,” the burly mountain man added.

“Yup, Wall Street. Nothing new to me, my friend!” the stockbroker enthusiastically responded.

“And after all the booze and drugs, the night usually ends with kinky sex…” the mountain man admitted.

“Again, Wall Street,” the stockbroker said nodding his head, assuring the mountain man he was an experienced partygoer. 

And then out of curiosity, he asked, “So how many people are coming to your party?”

 “Oh, just you and me…”                                                                                                                                                                              

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968 (and flipping people off forever!)

This is LTFU Joke #101!

There's no better way to 'Lighten the Fuck Up' than doing it wearing LTFU merch!

But don't take my word for it, here's markopolo's comment in LTFU Joke #98, "Lots of thumbs up and great comments when I wear your LTFU tee out in public."

Advertisement