Advertisement

Tom Holland Outed One Of The Spider-Men For Wearing a Fake Ass

“I’ll give you a spoiler, and I’m not going to tell you who, but one of us has a fake ass in their suit,” Holland said. “You can figure out that for yourselves.”

This is a CRUEL move by Holland if you ask me. We all know that he is an absurdly athletic and acrobatic freak, so the fake ass isn't his. So that leaves either oscar-nominated drama star Andrew Garfield or poker playing pussy patrol member Tobey Maguire. The way I phrase it makes it seem like it's obviously Maguire, but I honestly don't know. Garfield is really lanky and also British. Both of those things seem like major roadblocks to having an onion booty. Let's take a peek.

Maguire:

Garfield: 

I can't say for sure that the Garfield gif isn't a stuntman, but this is game over if it is him. Honestly, that's ok. Tobey is closing in on 50 and isn't exactly a super active fitness god, so whats the harm in him fitniss fake ass down his Spidey suit. The bigger issue to me is still Holland outing either one of his buddies for doing a little padding. However, those same rules don't apply to us civilians. 

Those of you that know me know that I am a fake-ass detective. I have been on the hunt for the truth about Tom Cruise's fake ass from the 2008 movie 'Valkyrie' for YEARS.

I've grilled every celebrity I've interviewed that has ever been in something with him on the subject, but the truth still evades me. I know that I at least have one guy in my corner, though.