New GOAT Alert: Lorenzo Insigne Is The Greatest Soccer Player In The World

Francesco Pecoraro. Getty Images.

There's no other way to say it - Lorenzo Insigne is the greatest soccer player in the world and I can't be convinced otherwise (excluding Ronaldo of course…)

So if you clicked on this blog, you then probably realized that MRags Cumrags wrote this and he doesn't know shit about soccer. You would be 100% correct! I don't know jack shit about soccer, but I do know FIFA fairly well and lately it's been my biggest addiction.

I pulled this Lorenzo Insigne Team of the Year Honorable Mentions (89 rated) and it's my favorite card in FIFA 22 right now. Mainly because I'm a slut for FIFA long shots. I equate them to hitting a 450+ ft bomb in the MLB. Yes, it's the same as a homer hitting the first row of seats behind the wall, but the momentum of hitting an absolute nuke can't be measured. 

On Thursday's stream, we got raided by a FIFA GOAT, aa9skillz, and then I proceeded to hit absurd long shots with Insigne:

His physicality is brutal because he's only 5'4" - but he's got the quads of a Greek God that lets him hit the ball at 10,000+ mph.

Look at the curve on these beautiful finesse shots…it's so aesthetically pleasing and makes opponents rage quit faster than anything.

 On a real soccer note, Insigne's going to be coming to the MLS next year which raises a lot of eyebrows. He'll be 31 in June, which would put him right at the tail end of his prime years. So, it's an interesting move to join the MLS at this point into his career, but he'll be getting an absolute pay day from Toronto FC.

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Imagine the long shots he'll be able to hit on MLS goalies? I can't wait to see em.

In closing, us vertically challenged people need to stick together. Like yeah, it's tough to accept that we need a step stool to reach the top kitchen cabinet, but we can be proud of our culture when 5'4" short king Lorenzo Insigne hits an absurd long shot. It gives me hope and for that, I'll always be a fan.