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Lighten the Fuck Up! Ray Told His Young Sexy Wife He Only Had 24 Hours to Live...

Oliver Gutfleisch. Shutterstock Images.

Ray returned home after having his annual physical only to tell his young sexy wife Kathy that his doctor discovered he had a rare condition that was in its final stages and gave him only 24 hours to live…

Given his dismal prognosis, Ray asked Kathy if they could have sex. Without hesitation, she agreed, and they went at it until they both collapsed in each other's loving arms… 

Six hours later, Ray shook his wife and said, "Honey, I only have 18 hours left to live. Could we please do it one more time?" Without hesitation, Kathy agreed, and they went at it again, collapsing in each other's loving arms when they were done… 

After a lengthy nap Ray woke up, looked at his watch, and realizing he only had 12 hours left to live, he gently touched his wife's shoulder and begged her, "Honey, please, just one more time before I die." Kathy didn't hesitate, "Of course, dear". They went at it a third time, after which Kathy, now exhausted, rolled over and fell sound asleep… 

Ray, however, worried about his impending death, tossed and turned until he only had 6 hours left to live. He frantically tapped his wife on the shoulder until she woke, "Honey, please, I only have 6 hours left to live, do you think we could…" 

At that point, Kathy interrupted and said, "Knock it off already Ray, I have to get up in the morning. You don't!"

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968