Advertisement

A Good Way To Spot a Psychopath Is To See If They Own This 'Squid Game' Alarm Clock That Actually Shoots You To Wake Up

As if I didn't need any more anxiety in my life, sure why not a $40 'Squid Game' alarm clock that shoots some kind of nerf bullet at me to get up. First of all there's no way in hell I'm waking up from the moment that traumatizing sound starts playing in time for me to dodge that shot. Nope, not a chance in hell. I actually could see myself sleeping with my mouth open one night and that sucker getting shot in there only for me to choke and die right then and there. The creepiness of the song and woman is enough for me to have nightmares forever, but now we're adding being shot at? No sir. Also, if you're bringing someone back to your place after a night out and they see your 'Squid Game' death trap alarm clock I'm pretty sure they're going to leave on a moment's notice and alert the authorities. 

Now I will say is this does seem like the perfect way to wake your kid up for school. It's evil for sure and would be a tell tale sign you hate your offspring, but gone would be the days of a parent having to come up with all sorts of creative methods to get their child out of the goddamn house and on the bus. My mom would go with the simple scream, threaten to call my dad at work, and then eventually flick water on my face. If that failed I was getting it dumped on me. It was a battle that I usually lost unless I managed to bribe her to help around the house after 'The Price Is Right' was done. Then I could skip, but only then. If she had this monster in her arsenal I would have never missed a single day ever. I'd be up an hour before just to avoid that fucking thing. 

Bottomline, if you're spending 40 bucks on this you're ending up on a watch list sooner rather than later.